When new towns are planned, it is important to build more public parks or sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spent their free time. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

#towns #parks #sports #facilities #centers #people #time

While planning new towns, taking care of facilities for the people is very important. Some people believe that there should be more public gardens and sport grounds as compare to shopping complexes.

However

Accept space

refers to the speaker or writer

am partially agree

Suggestion

partially agree

have partially agreed

with

this

statement.

To begin

with

Accept space

shopping malls are important to introduce while planning new towns.

Firstly

Accept space

shopping is the favourite activity for many people and in their leisure

time

, they want to spend their

time

in shopping complexes.

Thus it

Accept comma addition

Thus, it

should be keep

Suggestion

should keep

should be kept

in mind while planning new towns.

Moreover

Accept space

to buy the grocery or other products people need to go to shopping complexes and if the shopping Centres are built in towns, people do not need to go to big cities.

tThus

Suggestion

Thus

TThus

Accept space

it will save people's

time

. Probing

further

Accept space

other facilities

such

public garden

Suggestion

a public garden

public gardens

and sport centre is

also

essential to be built for the people while planning of

new town

Suggestion

new towns

the new town

First

of all, parks enhance the beauty of a town. People who want to remain close to nature and to enjoy the walk, prefer to go to garden.

Similarly

Accept space

children and youngsters like to play and spend their leisure

time

in parks.

In addition

, it will beneficial for the environment

also

Further

, Grounds should be built in order to make it possible for the people to play outside and

this

will result

into

Suggestion

improvement in their

heath

a healthy state of wellbeing free from disease

health

. In conclusion

Accept space

government should provide all necessary facilities while building new

towns so

Accept comma addition

towns, so

that people can enjoy their leisure

time

, pursue their hobbies and do shopping easily.

Mon Sep 16 2019

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

244 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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When new towns are planned, it is important to build more public parks or sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spent their free time. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Scientists believe that computers will become more intelligent than human beings. Some say it is a positive development while others say it is a negative development. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

🔶Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugar products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. 🔸Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self study is better for school students. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

number of arrests per year for using illegal drugs between 1991 to 2005