Some say that music, art, and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that at the grade
level
music, art, and theatre are worth studying with other curricula.
This
essay completely disagrees with the statement because these subjects are of least importance according to recent trends and children are immature to recognize their interests.
This
is an era of science and technology, so with the rapidly developing modern world rather than studying
arts
Suggestion
art
, music, and theatre, it is important to study science, math, and other related subjects according to the future prospect of the students.
Furthermore
, if grade students are interested, these subjects can be taught at home, in a summer vacation or as a side course during
pupil’s free time
Suggestion
the pupil’s free time
a pupil’s free time
pupil’s free times
because the addition of these subjects in the curriculum would result in the waste of precious time in the learning phase of primary students. At primary
level
students are too young to prioritize things and they barely know the importance of all subjects so, as these subject provide entertainment to the students it is more likely that they lose focus
from
Suggestion
of
the main course of study and deviate more towards these unimportant subjects.
However
, these should be subject of interest at secondary
level
when students are mature enough to select their career after considering everything.
For example
, a recent report published in the Daily times stated that the schools which introduce music and drama as part of curriculum fail to produce more creative students due to the lack of focus on important subjects. To conclude,
this
essay suggests that at basic
level
singing, acting and arts must not be given more importance because in
this
contemporary era, scientists and technologists are in demand,
moreover
, it results in a deviation from
normal study pattern
Suggestion
the normal study pattern
.
Submitted by zeerak0229 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic development
  • fostering
  • emotional intelligence
  • problem-solving skills
  • cultural awareness
  • curriculum
  • engaging
  • memorable
  • nurture
  • talents
  • core subjects
  • academic
  • professional success
What to do next:
Look at other essays: