Some people think that cultural traditions may be destroyed when they are used as money-making attractions aimed at tourists. Others believe it is the only way to save these traditions. Discuss on both sides and give your opinion.

There is no doubt that
tourism
industry
helps many nations develop their
economy which
Accept comma addition
economy, which
leads to more employment opportunities and new network infrastructure of
host community
Suggestion
the host community
host communities
. The
opinion
is divided on the matter. There are people who believe
tourism
has
detrimental effect
Suggestion
a detrimental effect
detrimental effects
on
cultural heritage
Suggestion
the cultural heritage
of a nation if it is only used to increase profitability.
However
, others hold the
opinion
that
this
helps the host country to rehabilitate its traditions.
This
essay intends to delve into both sides before forming an
opinion
. I personally side with the latter.
To begin
with,
although
tourism
has brought a lot of benefits to many
countries especially
Accept comma addition
countries, especially
those ailing weak or fragile
economy
, it has deleterious effects on
environment
Suggestion
the environment
and resources. The areas that were once to be pristine are filled with luxury hotels, commercial airlines, large shopping malls and resorts. The heavy construction and the machinery used for building
such
tourist destination cause many problems
such
as soil erosion, loss of virgin land and forest just to name a few.
This
heavy construction equals pollution and
rises
raise the level or amount of something
raises
the price of land which indigent people can no longer afford to buy one.
Moreover
, the influx of tourists
arise
Suggestion
arises
problems
such
as over consumption of resources and over production of waste.
Overconsumption
of resources bring about water shortage, loss of natural resources. Over production of waste shows itself in the form of water and air pollution.
Finally
,
this
tourist
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centre
centres
Centers
don’t attract
Suggestion
doesn’t attract
environmentally conscious clientele.
However
, to preserve the cultural tradition, local community
need
Suggestion
needs
to allocate a considerable amount of money which seems unlikely for many countries to earn in a way other than
tourism
. The
money which
Accept comma addition
money, which
is attained from
tourism
industry
can
also
invest in other important sectors
such
as education, infrastructure of the city,
economy
and
industry
, etc.
Besides
, it helps government to conserve
archeological
related to or dealing with or devoted to archaeology
archaeological
sites which are on the verge of being knocked down. If a country takes a positive approach in alluring
travelers
a person who changes location
travellers
travelling
from all over the world, it will definitely flourish the country
further
down the road. To illustrate, china enjoys
tourism
industry which
Accept comma addition
industry, which
helps the nation develop its infrastructure by adding more metro lines and improving its roads like the commercial road which was built to cut the long distance to Pakistan. Overall, I’m of
opinion
that preservation of cultural traditions very much depends on the
economy
. To boost the
economy
,
tourism
Suggestion
the tourism industry
industry
can help governments with their expenditure on different areas like education and non-educational purposes including
archeological
related to or dealing with or devoted to archaeology
archaeological
sites.
Submitted by xiquachvagau on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Commercialization
  • Dilution of cultural traditions
  • Authenticity
  • Cultural heritage
  • Revenue
  • Financial support
  • Preservation
  • Promotion
  • Commodification of culture
  • Intrinsic value
  • Exposure
  • Global awareness
  • Respect and understanding
  • Economic gain
  • Local communities
  • Decision-making processes
  • Respectful portrayal
What to do next:
Look at other essays: