IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys?

#parents #children #toys #child
Toys have always been the best companion for any kid.
This
 is probably the reason that all kids love to play with toys. But, the same enthusiasm isn't shown by all the parents. Some parents restrict the
number
 of toys they buy for their offsprings whereas other parents buy their kids a
lot
 of toys.
This
 essay will discuss the positives and negatives associated with children possessing a
lot
 of toys. On the one hand, owning a
lot
 of toys would positively affect the
energy
 of the kids.
For example
, as per a recent survey, kids with large amount of toys tend to display high
energy
 levels in
playschools
Suggestion
Playschools
.
This
 is due to the
fact
 that the kids with large
number
 of toys, have a
lot
 of options which makes them more energetic as they would want to play with all of the toys most of the time.
Hence
, more amount of toys
positively affect
Suggestion
positively affects
 the
energy
 levels of the kids.
On the other hand
, owning a
lot
 of toys would encourage the kid to become more materialistic in nature.
For example
, as per a recent survey, kids that own a
lot
 of toys tend to demand even greater
number
 of toys as they grow.
This
 is due to the
fact
 that the kids associate happiness with having a
lot
 of toys and subconsciously, the kids develop the
fact
 that they can be happy with larger
number
 of toys or things.
Hence
, more amount of toys negatively affects the materialistic nature of the kids. To summarize, providing a
lot
 of toys
to
Suggestion
for
 kids has both advantages and disadvantages. The advantage of owning a
lot
 of toys is the
fact
 that
this
 helps in increasing the
energy
 of the kids as they have to play with more toys, which makes
they
objective case of they
them
 energetic. But,
this
also
 results in the kids becoming materialistic as they associate happiness with the
number
 of toys they possess.
Submitted by kelevifi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: