IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people think that a huge amount of time and money is spent on the protection of wild animals, and that this money could be better spent on the human population. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #amount #time #money #protection #animals #population
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It is a controversial issue as to whether a greater amount of
time
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 and
money
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 should be spent in saving lives of forest's fauna, or, whether human population could have become the main priority in helping by
money
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 and
time
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. Personally, I believe that saving environs have become essential for protecting humanity, so wild creatures ought to save
first
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.
To begin
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 with, a wide range of wild animals is going extinct due to the widespread devastation caused by human beings. For that reason, it should be saved for balancing eco-system;
otherwise
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, the imbalance creates myriads of dire consequences
such
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 as lack of chemicals affect the production of medicine, and the extinction of one animal may unable to supply food for other creatures result in the loss of precious wild animals.
Besides
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, if the animals of the forest are extinct, people will not get food for their sustenance.
Thus
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,
money
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 and
time
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 should be given to saving wild animals.
Similarly
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, people think that they spend lots of
money
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 on the wild creature;
however
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, I think that the whole world, including myself, believe that they spend
time
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 in discussions
such
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 as making seminars, creating awareness among people
instead
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 of protecting wild animals.
In contrast
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, the expenditure should go to save animals as if they are our pivotal part of our life. What is more, the wild animal protection depends on the charities which come from different organizations.
That is
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 why volunteers should spend
time
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 on correct institutions to protect the life of wild animals who save human beings. In conclusion,
money
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 and
time
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 have to be spent on the human population, which I believe unimportant, while if the revenue from governments and public authorities and the valuable
time
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 of volunteers can expense on sheltering animals of wildlife, the human population could be saved, automatically, because people destroy wildlife.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem stability
  • pollination
  • water purification
  • climate regulation
  • eco-tourism
  • scientific research
  • moral and ethical responsibility
  • deforestation
  • pollution
  • financial cost
  • social issues
  • healthcare
  • education
  • fund allocation
What to do next:
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