Some people think governments should spend less money on arts and invest more in education. How far do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #governments #money #arts #education

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Education

Use synonyms

is the vital in the development of any

country

Use synonyms

. I believe it is necessary to invest more government's budget

into

Suggestion

schools and educational facilities

instead

Linking Words

of spending too much

money

Use synonyms

for

arts

Suggestion

the arts

, because once

education

Use synonyms

is developed, other sides of the

country

Use synonyms

, including

economy

Suggestion

the economy

and culture are

also

Linking Words

improved.

Firstly

Linking Words

development

Suggestion

the development

education

Use synonyms

facilitates decrease in

unemployment ratio

Suggestion

the unemployment ratio

of a

country

Use synonyms

through improving

labor

a social class comprising those who do manual labor or work for wages

labour

skills, and

therefore

Linking Words

national economy

Suggestion

the national economy

grows up. As the result, national gross income increases and government can have more budgets for other fields,

such

Linking Words

as culture, arts, healthcare

etcectra

more than is needed, desired, or required

extra

For instance

Linking Words

, employees with high skills can earn more so, they have to pay more tax for

government

Suggestion

the government

. Government can use

this

Linking Words

money

Use synonyms

to develop other sectors which are somehow out of consideration.

Moreover

Linking Words

, investing in

education

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

means investing on arts because many arts subjects are taught in schools.

Secondly

Linking Words

, building new schools, purchasing educational facilities or supporting for teachers and students in poor rural areas, need a large amount of

money

Use synonyms

. In Vietnam, a lot of students do not have

chance

Suggestion

a chance

the chance

to go to school, or they have to stop learning because of tough financial conditions of their family.

Besides

Linking Words

that, in many undeveloped areas, educational infrastructure is limited, learning resources are incomplete, facilities are too old and

need be renewed

Suggestion

need to be renewed

Education

Use synonyms

effects on many other national fields and plays

Suggestion

important role in

development

Suggestion

the development

of any

country

Use synonyms

. For these reasons above, I agree that governments ought to spend less

money

Use synonyms

on arts and invest more in

education

Use synonyms

Mon Sep 30 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

254 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
In spite of advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?
It is argued that although there have been developments in agricultural areas, numerous human beings still lack food in the world. In my opinion, this problem is caused by a lack of money and area. For these reasons, richer nations would provide job opportunities to these people, and help them to reach clean water.
6
band
Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems.To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In today's world, pollution like air, water, and noise pollution, have become a significant impact on human health. While some people argue that carcinogenic products cause diseases, some individuals contend that environmental pollution produces more hazardous damage. In this case, I perceive noxious foodstuffs may lead to more health issues and cancers than pollution. Thus, I suppose the disagreement of focusing more on environmental pollution.
7.5
band
Many companies sponsor sports as a way of advertising themselves. Some people think this is good for the world of sport, while others think it is negative. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There are several physical activities that are very popular across the countries for example, soccer as a group sport or MotoGP as an individual sport. Supported by information technology development nowadays, millions of eyes can watch it through various kinds of electronic devices, such as television that takes the biggest part or mobile phones as individual portable devices. This phenomenon was exposed by businesses to take part in terms as sponsors for certain favourable sports to promote their goods or services through commercial marketing. Collaboration between the enterprises with sports would have mutualistic symbiosis, such as the enterprises could provide funding for specific competition or federation that would improve the sport's quality, in return they can put massive promotions for their business. At the same time, it is possible if the corporations potentially have bargaining power to control specific kinds of sports.
6.5
band
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
Excessive sugar consumption in processed foods and beverages has been associated with numerous health issues, including obesity and diabetes. Making sugary products more expensive could help reduce their consumption. In my opinion, I firmly support this idea and this essay will explain why this option is the best.
4
band
Some people say that success is "10 percent talent and 90 percent hard work". Is hard work the key to success, or is talent also important
It has been a remarkable question whether talent or hard-working is important. Many people are believe that genuis is essential. While, others believe vice versa. from my perspective, intelligence is the key factor for success.

Some people think governments should spend less money on arts and invest more in education. How far do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

In spite of advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many companies sponsor sports as a way of advertising themselves. Some people think this is good for the world of sport, while others think it is negative. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that success is "10 percent talent and 90 percent hard work". Is hard work the key to success, or is talent also important