IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there is more advantage to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadvantages of living in a house compared with living in an apartment?

More
often
Punctuation problem
often,
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 we can hear that everybody
dreaming
Wrong verb form
dreams
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to buy
Change preposition
of buying
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 a place for living to establish
Correct article usage
a homes
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homes
Fix the agreement mistake
home
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in
Change preposition
apply
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. Truthfully, many
people
Use synonyms
 believe that living in a house is more beneficial than
in
Verb problem
living in
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the
Correct article usage
a
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 building. The following essay takes a look at both sides of the argument and
explain
Correct subject-verb agreement
explains
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 if living in the home
have
Wrong verb form
has more
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 pros
against
Change preposition
than
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 living in
the
Correct article usage
an
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 apartment. It is true that houses
ensuring
Wrong verb form
ensure
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better
Correct article usage
a better
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 quality of life and more commodities for a family. As an example, the families
within
Change preposition
with
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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more children can ensure enough space in the house and at least a small yard for outdoor activities.
Also
Linking Words
,
commute
Check wording
commuting
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 and neighbours are more often
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 longer in the same place, because of
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is more secure than living in the building blocks.
However
Linking Words
, a disadvantage is
longer
Correct article usage
the longer
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 travelling time to the city and job.
In addition
Linking Words
, life in the apartment brings different advantages and
environment
Correct article usage
an environment
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.
This
Linking Words
 living style prefers younger
people
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 because of the dynamics and nightlife.
For instance
Linking Words
, the apartment
gives commodity
Check wording
provides the convenience
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 of
urban
Correct article usage
an urban
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 area
within
Change preposition
with
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 all
necessary
Correct article usage
the necessary
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stuff what
Check wording
amenities
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 surrounding
them
Correct pronoun usage
it
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. As the examples are shops and offices.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, constant
people
Use synonyms
 turn over made
this
Linking Words
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 type less secure for the living. Taking everything into consideration, even
both
Correct word choice
though both
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accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 types have pros and cons
we
Punctuation problem
, we
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 can declare if it is more beneficial to live in the house rather
in
Correct word choice
than in
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 the apartments. In short,
this
Linking Words
 purely
depending
Wrong verb form
depends
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of
Change preposition
on
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 the human's lifestyle and living needs, same as if we are living alone or with family. All of it rarely depends on the period
people
Use synonyms
 are in, which circumstances can be changed every day.

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structure
State your main view in the intro and give a clear end to the essay with a short verdict.
planning
Group ideas in a neat order: house good, house bad, apartment good, a final view.
language
Use simple, easy words and fix big grammar help so each sentence is clear.
content
Give real and clear examples that fit the point you make.
content
The essay tries to compare house and apartment in many points.
content
It uses some useful examples like space, yard, and shops.
idea
There is a good attempt to link lifestyle with choice of home.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • privacy
  • maintenance costs
  • upkeep
  • amenities
  • security
  • lock-and-leave lifestyle
  • commute
  • affordable
  • shared walls
  • suburbs
  • outdoor area
  • restrictions
  • responsibilities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: