Films and games can be accessed at any time from mobile devices, like smartphones, tablets and laptop computers. Do the advantages of such developments outweigh the disadvantages?

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Technology gets more innovative as the years go by and makes

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

human life easier. Today, movies can be watched from any computer equipment.

This

Linking Words

also

Linking Words

true for video

games

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss the benefits and disbenefits of

this

Linking Words

development. There are two main advantages to being able to get these things at the tip of one’s fingers which include low cost of purchasing and time saving. The availability of the internet in most parts of the world and

also

Linking Words

the presence of computer-like equipment has made accessing videos and video-like

games

Use synonyms

easy.

As a result

Linking Words

, people do not need to purchase these products anymore, as

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

can be easily downloaded, thereby saving cost. In the past, individuals who

wish

Wrong verb form

wished

show examples

to play or watch a particular movie had to walk down to the game/video centre to see the movie.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is no

Rephrase

longer

show examples

necessary in today’s world,

thus

Linking Words

saving our time. Distraction and loss of employment are drawbacks to the easy access we have to movies and

games

Use synonyms

. Individuals of today, most especially young adults are easily distracted. Most times, they are always playing

games

Use synonyms

the

Change the word

their

show examples

smartphones

instead

Linking Words

of reading.

This

Linking Words

trend can be noticed from the library to the lecture rooms and is evident in the average grades of most students today, as there has been a decrease in college

students

Change noun form

students'

student's

show examples

grades worldwide.

In addition

Linking Words

, persons whose means of livelihood were selling

Change preposition

apply

show examples

these commodities in our local societies will be out of jobs because the internet is doing a good job of distributing it worldwide. In conclusion,

this

Linking Words

essay discussed the benefits and pitfalls of accessing films and

games

Use synonyms

on our personal computers. In my opinion, I believe

this

Linking Words

development is doing more good than harm.

ayomeahMon Oct 07 2019

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task achievement

Provide clearer examples to support your points. For instance, when discussing the cost savings, you could mention subscription services or free platforms as specific examples.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea. This can enhance clarity and guide your readers more effectively through the essay.

coherence cohesion

Vary your vocabulary to avoid repetition, especially in your introduction. Instead of using 'video-like games,' consider using 'video games' for clarity.

task achievement

You have a clear introduction that outlines the main topic and the structure of your essay.

coherence cohesion

The transition between your paragraphs is logical, making it relatively easy to follow your argument.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

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Films and games can be accessed at any time from mobile devices, like smartphones, tablets and laptop computers. Do the advantages of such developments outweigh the disadvantages?

Over the past few decades, technological appliances have increasingly become common features inclass. Context, many people worry that this may lead to the disappearance of traditional educators?to what extent do you agree or disagree

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why do people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?

Serious violent crime among people who under - 18 are becoming more common. Some people think that children who commit serious crimes should be treated like adults, while others would say that they should be rehabilitaited. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe extreme sports are dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?