Advertising targeted at children will bring negative effects on the young, do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

We are currently living in a modern society, surrounded with massive number of advertisements from newspaper to social media platforms, as well as children are. While some argue that kids are not negatively influenced by children targeting ads, I believe that promoting materials targeted at children

has been

Suggestion

have been

harmful for them. On the one hand, a few portions of commercials

has

Suggestion

have

positive impacts on children. Some ads concerning life essentials can affect children to behave and demand for healthy habits or products.

For example

, ads can help children crave for nutritious food

such

as dairy and minerals or teach them to brush their teeth regularly.

In addition

, informative advertisement showing their social commitment of corporations is beneficial for teenagers. From a few years ago, one convenience store franchise started to advertise their social service called

children safety zone

Suggestion

a child safety zone

child safety zone

the child safety zone

children's safety zone

, in which staffs call police when a

child

Suggestion

child's

customer is in an emergency situation.

On the other hand

, the majority of commercial aimed for children has adverse consequences. The youth can be exposed by commercialism, which makes people evaluate their self-esteem depends on the ability to possess products. Most of the psychologists,

children

Suggestion

child

experts and educators have said that materialism and commercialism increased the growing rate of children’s depression, lower self-esteem and suicidal thought. Aside from that, the young are not skilled enough to compare products regarding various values.

Furthermore

, advertisers abuse

this

fact and make advertisement stimulating to children in order to use pester power. In conclusion, there are convincing arguments both and for influence of children targeting adverts and I believe that they are nothing but harmful contents

Suggestion

the young.

Mon Oct 07 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunities to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Over the last two or three decades, the international student's ratio has increased as compared to the past. In the past days, student used to study their native land but now they get a degree from the foreign land. This phenomenon has benefits and drawbacks; this essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons.
7
band
You recently bought a camera while travelling overseas. When you got to your destination you discovered that some important items were missing from the box. Write a letter to the local representative of the company. In your letter • give details of the camera and where you bought it • explain what has happened • say what you want him/her to do about it
I am writing in connection with the camera that has just been bought from Safir shop in Oman. This camera is produced by your company and belongs to A serious. According to information on its box and website, these cameras have particular characterisation for example, two lenses, a place for additional memory and a cover for supporting water.
5
band
The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Driving is always a convenient way for people to go out. Since the appearance of the first car on British roads in 1888, vehicles are used more frequently. Currently, it is not surprising to see plenty of cars, buses, etc running on the roads. In view of this situation, it is suggested that more types of transport should be promoted and laws should be made. Personally, I agree that there is a need to do something in order to alleviate the problem of such a large amount of vehicles on the roads.
7.5
band
The advent of the internet has made it possible for people to work from home. Do you feel this working argument has more advantages or disadvantages? Share your personal experience in your essay.
In our modern world, the Internet has a huge impact on our lives, including our daily actions. Working is one of these aspects that has been influenced, such as working at home via the Internet. I utterly agree that being a remote worker has more benefits than drawbacks. In the rest of this essay, I will talk about time flexibility and less stress.
5.5
band
There is a growing awareness among people today that life should be enjoyed in all possible ways while the traditionalists do not agree with this view. They think that there are much more to be done in life other than just enjoying. Discuss both the views and draw your own opinions.
Nowadays, enjoyment of life has been gaining popularity in society. Though, people who are more traditional have the opposite view. I believe life is too short and time is passing so quickly so people need to enjoy it as much as they can.

Advertising targeted at children will bring negative effects on the young, do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The advent of the internet has made it possible for people to work from home. Do you feel this working argument has more advantages or disadvantages? Share your personal experience in your essay.

There is a growing awareness among people today that life should be enjoyed in all possible ways while the traditionalists do not agree with this view. They think that there are much more to be done in life other than just enjoying. Discuss both the views and draw your own opinions.