IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitat and some are even threatened to the point of extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem?

#deforestation #development #species #habitat #point #extinction #animals #measures
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays many animal
spices
Correct your spelling
species
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 are becoming
extinction
Replace the word
extinct
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due to
Linking Words
 human activity
Linking Words
for
Add the comma(s)
, for
show examples
 instance, cutting trees and hunting. In the following
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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 I will discuss some of the biggest problems associated with animal extinction and will propose solutions to tackle
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, one of the most significant reasons
of assert
Change preposition
for asserting
show examples
animals
Use synonyms
 is
food
Add an article
a food
the food
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 chain.
Firstly
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, it can be clearly seen that
animals
Use synonyms
also
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 help us to
providing
Change the verb form
provide
show examples
 a part of
food
Add an article
the food
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 chain like
,
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apply
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 dairy and protein.
Secondly
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, the majority of
Add an article
the country
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country
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countries
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 in the world
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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have
a
Correct article usage
apply
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different
business
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businesses
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.
For example
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, Africa
it
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apply
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is
Correct article usage
the center
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center
Change the spelling
centre
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 of animal species and their people have great income in
this
Linking Words
 way.
Thirdly
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,
conserve
Wrong verb form
conserving
show examples
animals
Use synonyms
 not only
does it
Verb problem
apply
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plays a crucial role but
also
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
cones
Correct your spelling
comes
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 with
multitude
Correct article usage
a multitude
show examples
benefits
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of benefits
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such
Linking Words
 as
,
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apply
show examples
 animal fertilizer.
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Also
Add a comma
Also,
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 it can
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
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on growth
plants
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of plants
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 and trees.
On the other hand
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, the best way to tackle
tis
Correct your spelling
this
problem
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 is in the hands of the
high ranking
Add a hyphen
high-ranking
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 official.
Moreover
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, if the government
enforcing
Wrong verb form
enforces
show examples
 draconian punishments we will be faced with less human activity.
Nevertheless
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, another factor which must be considered is
improvement
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the improvement
an improvement
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 of
educational
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education
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. Recent research has shown that
with
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apply
show examples
counseling
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counselling
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 and making people aware could help us to tackle
this
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problem
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, with
develop
Replace the word
the development of
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 provincial towns deforestation will
occurred
Wrong verb form
occur
show examples
.
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
furthermore
Linking Words
, enhancing building construction should not be run just for financial objectives. In conclusion, today we are suffering from
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of natural resources
because
Add the preposition
because of
show examples
 human activity like
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 cutting trees and hunting
animals
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 enforcing draconian punishments and providing education we can solve
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by arsanmirzaee9260 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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