Some people believe that teaching music in schools is a vital part of growing up and the human experience, whilst others believe that teaching music in schools is a waste of time and resources. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#people #music #schools #part #whilst #waste #time #resources

In modern day society,

education

has become a vital aspect of every child’s life. Educational facilities tend to offer a wide range of subjects aimed at educating children and teaching them various skills. Fundamental

subject

areas are said to be mathematics, science, languages and physical

education

. Depending on the type of educational facility, a certain

subject

might be emphasised, yet these core

subject

areas are usually incorporated into nearly all educational facilities.

Although

it is commonly agreed that these subjects are vital for a child’s educational upbringing, opinions differ when it comes to the

subject

music

. Whilst some believe that musical

education

is an important part of growing up, others believe that it should no longer be taught in schools, as it is considered a waste of time and resources.

Music

Suggestion

The music

falls under the

subject

area of art, causing it to often be considered as less valuable than other subjects.

Typically people

Accept comma addition

Typically, people

believe that learning to express oneself in a creative manner is less important than learning about mathematical theories and scientific facts. Often the opponents of musical

education

propose that a

more rationally

Suggestion

more rational

-based

education

will benefit children later on in their lives, as they will be able to perceive and comprehend the logical aspects of life more easily. The supporters of

musical

Suggestion

music

education

argue that

music

is beneficial for children, because it offers a manner of creative self-expression.

Furthermore

music

is part of human culture, as it brings people together and

therefore

children who study

music

can obtain a sense of cultural knowledge.

Personally I

Accept comma addition

Personally, I

believe that

music

should be taught in schools and that it is not a waste of time and resources. I played piano for seven years and believe that

this

has helped me become a more balanced person. It is important for a child to learn about thinking creatively and to take a break from logical subjects once in a while. In conclusion,

music

should be taught at school, because it enables children to express themselves creatively and to learn more about culture and human interaction.

Submitted by ahmedmamer94 on Tue Oct 15 2019

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Summary
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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

342 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

fundamental
instilling
discipline
team work
emotional intelligence
stress relief
well-rounded
allocated
STEM subjects
practical
job market
detract
core subjects
enhance
cognitive functions
curriculum
vital
enriching

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Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The government needs to spend money to encourage the development of sports and arts for school students, rather than to support professional sports and art events. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Differences between countries are becoming less evident. Nowadays people are watching the same films, brands, advertisements and TV channels. To what extent do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advanatges?

As a results of tourism and the increasing number of people travelling, there is an growing demand for more flights. what problems does this have on the environment? what measures could be taken to solve the problem?

In a public-funded healthcare system, people who are willing to pay for the best and fast treatment should be able to do so. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?