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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Living in big cities is bad for people’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#cities #people’s #health
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There is a growing concern about the impact of
city
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life
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 on urban citizens’
health
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. While I agree that the availability of
health
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 services and facilities in
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city centers
Suggestion
the city centre
city centre
city centres
 would benefit urban inhabitants greatly, I believe that
city
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life
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also
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 has detrimental effects on people’s
health
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.
Firstly
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, I admit that living in cities is beneficial
for
Suggestion
to
 people’s
health
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 to some certain extent.
City
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 dwellers can easily
access fitness
Accept comma addition
access, fitness
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
 and recreation
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
 to improve their physical well-being and relieve stress, whereas those places might not be provided in the countryside.
Besides
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, compared to those patients living in rural areas their counterparts living in cities might be able to access better
health
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 facilities and innovative technologies that can help with diagnosing a variety of diseases
such
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 as diabetes or cancer at an early stage and effectively treating them.
However
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, I believe that some physical and mental
health
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 problems would likely be the result of
city
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life
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. The constant stream of noise from construction sites and transportation systems would result in noise pollution, and
this
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 might cause hypertension, tinnitus and sleep disturbances. Pollutants including exhaust emissions from motor vehicles and coal ash from industrial parks and are the main culprits of a number of
health
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 problems including respiratory infections, heart disease and lung cancer. Heavy traffic congestion in some metropolises like Beijing often makes commuters feel frustrated, and busy lifestyles might deprive people their time to relax, negatively affecting their
health
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. In conclusion, while I agree that the advantages that
city
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life
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 would bring to urban citizens are undeniable, I believe that some clear negative consequences for their physical and psychological well-being should not be denied.
Submitted by lulaluclacfamily on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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