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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.
#carbon #dioxide #emissions #person #kingdom #sweden
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The graph illustrates average
carbon
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 dioxide
emissions
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 per person from the
year
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 1967 to 2007 in four different countries.
Overall
Linking Words
, here we see that in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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 the
number
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 of
carbon
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emissions
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 was much more than
any
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in any
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 other country. Compare to that
in
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apply
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Sweden
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, people
were became
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were becoming
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 more
carefull
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careful
carefully
 about
carbon
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emissions
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. It is noticeable that in Portugal
carbon
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emissions
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 upsurge
in
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by
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 a great amount
of
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apply
show examples
number
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 which was almost 1 metric
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tonnes
Change to a singular noun
tonne
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 in 1967 and it increased just above 5 metric
tonnes
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 in 1997. But it remained steady from the
year
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 1997 to 2007.
On the other hand
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, at first
carbon
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emissions
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 boomed between the
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year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
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 1967 and 1977 in
Sweden
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, which began at above 8 metric
tonnes
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 and it increased about 10 metric
tonnes
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.
However
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, it declined dramatically from the
year
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 1977 till the end and it stopped
decreased
Wrong verb form
decreasing
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at
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to
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 about 5 metric
tonnes
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.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
carbon
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emissions
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 were the same in the
year
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 2007 in Portugal and
Sweden
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 and their amount was more than 5 metric
tonnes
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.
Moreover
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,
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Sweden
Change noun form
Sweden's
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carbon
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emissions
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 cast crossed Italy in 1987 and their
number
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 was about 7 metric
tonnes
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 when they crossed each other.
Linking Words
At
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In
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 the end, in
United
Correct article usage
the United
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 Kingdom people threw
carbon
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 dioxide about 11 metric
tonnes
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 and their
number
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 was always high throughout the period

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words carbon, emissions, year, number, sweden, tonnes with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 5 times.
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