Some students take a year off between school and University to work or travel. Do the advantage s of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Quite a number of students go on a twelve months pre-
university
break to either work or travel.
Although
, taking a break can help expose and broaden the minds of these students
,
Accept space
,
a break
also
distracts them from their goal of getting an
education
. In my opinion
,
Accept space
,
the disadvantages far outweighs the advantages. The idea of travelling and working is a good one in itself because it tends to give exposure to a usually timid mindset.So when students decide to journey round the world
,
Accept space
,
it helps
then
objective case of they
them
broaden their minds because they get to experience the culture of other people and countries.
For instance
,
Accept space
,
a survey carried out
,
Accept space
,
concluded that students who travel and experience other people's ways of life tend to be more welcoming in their approach to people from other countries and cultures. Working
also
gives them an opportunity to save up for the educational pursuit ahead. To illustrate
,
Accept space
,
80% of students in Africa work after secondary school to pay their way through college
However
.
students
Suggestion
Students
who experience so much exposure
as a result
of
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
get distracted from their goal to pursue a post secondary educational qualification.
For example
,
Accept space
,
A survey conducted by the educational holiday research institute in Melbourne, concluded that most pre
university
travellers ended up straying away from the initial goal of going to the
university
.
Also
, in the course of working and making money
,
Accept space
,
most of these students do not see the use of furthering their
education
, believing that they are achieving the purpose of
education
as it already. As an illustration
,
Accept space
,
90% of students living in Africa believe that the main purpose of working is to make money
,
Accept space
,
so when they do prior to getting a
university
education
,
Accept space
,
they believe they have achieved the main purpose of an
education
and
therefore
,
Accept space
,
do away with
further
post secondary
education
. To conclude
,
Accept space
,
I am of the opinion that the drawbacks of working or
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
pre
university
by students
,
Accept space
,
far outweighs the benefits, because not working or
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
makes them focus on the goal.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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