The graphs above give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010.
The graphs illustrate the percentage of
computer
ownership in the population
over period 8
years and based on education level in the years 2002 and 2010. The education level Change preposition
of 8
that
surveyed were no high Correct pronoun usage
apply
school
diploma
, high school
graduate, college (incomplete), bachelor’s degree and postgraduate qualification.
Over period
Correct article usage
the period
8
years, it can be seen that Change preposition
of 8
computer
ownership was
increased gradually. It is around 55% used in 2002Unnecessary verb
apply
,
and became 70% in 2010. The upward of the Remove the comma
apply
computer
user based on different education level
which Fix the agreement mistake
levels
was have
Change the verb form
had
similar
trend, around 10 – 20%, exception Add an article
a similar
no
high Change preposition
of no
school
diploma
that had increasing
around 25%.
The highest Change the verb form
to increase
population
that used Add an article
a computer
computer
was postgraduate Fix the agreement mistake
computers
qualification
, both in 2002 and 2010, Fix the agreement mistake
qualifications
while
the lowest population
was no high school
diploma
. In 2010, addition around 20% percentage
postgraduate Change preposition
of percentage
population
used computer
from 70% in 2002. Fix the agreement mistake
computers
While
,
the Remove the comma
apply
population
of
no high Change preposition
with
school
diploma
added around 25% from 10% in 2002.
So, commonly the commonly
Change the adverb
common
computer
ownership was increased.Submitted by namirahtea on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words computer, population, school, diploma with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 5 times.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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