hese days, we are seeing an increasing amount of violence on television, and this is having a negative impact on children's behaviour. Do you agree or disagree?

The type of content being watched on
televeision
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television
or computer by a person has a
longlasting
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long-lasting
show examples
influence on their psyche. The effect will be even more profound if the viewers are in
Correct article usage
the initail
show examples
initail
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initial
years of their growth and development. Many behavioural studies have reported that movies,
vedio
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video
games, cartoons and
serials
Replace the word
series
show examples
copuld
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could
have a significant impact on the personality of a child.
Although
positive
Add an article
the positive
show examples
message is being
deliverd
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delivered
by many many media houses, the amount of
voilence
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violence
the amount of
voilence
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violence
that
has been
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
shown on
televison
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television
is rising day by day. Displaying
voilence
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violence
on
small
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a small
show examples
screen has negative effects on
fragile
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the fragile
show examples
brains of children. it is being reported in many psychological studies that children who are habitual of watching cartoons and movies related to the action and
thril
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thrill
genre
were
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
more likely to develop
agressive
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aggressive
personalities in their adulthoods;because
,
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apply
show examples
it
act
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acts
show examples
as a stimulus for their
conciousness
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consciousness
which make them
to
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apply
show examples
consider spilling
blood
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the blood
show examples
of others as a way of making them
to
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apply
show examples
give up to their legal and illegal demands.
Besides
, it
also
increase
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increases
show examples
frusteration
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frustration
in the personalities of viewers
consequently
making them angry and intolerant
to
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of
show examples
others
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others'
other's
show examples
percpectives
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perspectives
. Agression and poor
behavious
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behaviours
behaviour
not only
effect
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affect
show examples
childhoods
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the childhoods
show examples
of those children but
also
have
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
impact on their
peronalities
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personalities
in
teenages
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teenage
and
adulthoods
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adulthood
show examples
. For many years, different
case
Fix the agreement mistake
cases
show examples
of gun-shootig at different
pulic
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public
places including mosques and
eduction
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education
show examples
institutes
een
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been
reported all
arround
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around
the world. in those
case
Fix the agreement mistake
cases
show examples
, most of the culprits were found to be in
thier
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their
teenage and infatuated with the pride of superiority, which
make
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
them
to
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apply
show examples
take
lives
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the lives
show examples
of others.
Besides
these prominent cases of public killing, many young adults become a part of
a street gangs
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street gangs
a street gang
show examples
and start practising
henious
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heinous
crimes.
Eventhough
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Even though
there are many other factors which can be the reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
their miss-leaded life,
according to
cognative
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cognitive
studies
voilent
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violent
content, which was being watched in their childhoods, has a profound impact on their
peronalities
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personalities
.
Lastly
, it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
cann
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can
e concluded that
shilde
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Shilde
show examples
should be refrained from watching any content unsupervised.
Submitted by mic.jan.thomas on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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