IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Many businesses in the world today are run by family members. Do the advantages of family-run businesses outweigh the disadvantages. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your experiences or knowledge

#businesses #world #members #experiences
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Now a days many
business
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 people all over the world continue their
business
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 with their family members. Some people continue their family
business
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next
Linking Words
 to their parents. Most of the people think that the particular
business
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 is the pride of their family. They
also
Linking Words
 think that it is the identity of their family. But I've a different opion
over
a personal belief or judgment that is not founded on proof or certainty
opinion
open
this
Linking Words
 topic. Every
person
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 have t
heir
Suggestion
has
 own talent and own ideas to do in their life. Since some people wish to continue their
business
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 over the generations, They insist their family
member
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 to take over the
business
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. Even they have different idea to do in their life, They are not allowi
ng to sh
Suggestion
allowed
ine in their wished career path. Due to their emotional sentiments, those people are dropping their wishes and goal and take over the
business
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. Even they don'
t
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 have much skill in that
business
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, They make them to be a
part
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 in that
business
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. They think that their
business
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 should be filled with their family members only. They are forcing their family members to too
k
to a degree exceeding normal or proper limits
too
part
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 in the
business
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. Since many
business
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 people have their own family
member
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 in their
business
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, The skilled people from other family are not allowi
ng to ta
Suggestion
allowed
ke
part
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 in their
business
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. Every
person
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 have t
heir
Suggestion
has
 own dream and goal. With that goal, They are working hard to go forward to achieve that. Due to
this
Linking Words
 kind of
busine
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ss man, The
a person engaged in commercial or industrial business (especially an owner or executive)
businessman
ir dreams are vanishing. Even their family members are not skilled in that
business
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, They won'
t
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 allow other people to take
part
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 in their
business
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.
This
Linking Words
 may leads
their
Suggestion
lead
business
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 to loss. But they won'
t
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 care about
such
Linking Words
 stuff, They always
wants their
Suggestion
always want
are always wanting
business
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 to be run by one of our family
member
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. Beca
Suggestion
members
use of
this
Linking Words
, Sometime there won'
t
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 be a right
person
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 in right
position .
Suggestion
the right position
Accept space
.
 On con
cl
Suggestion
In
uding
this
Linking Words
, Right
talent to be
Suggestion
the right talent
the Right talent
 in right
place. Ever
Suggestion
the right place
y
person
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 have t
heir
Suggestion
has
 own talent. We should to force our family
member
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 to be stick
with
Suggestion
stuck
our own family
business
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. We should let them to shi
ne in th
Suggestion
shine
eir own field. A
business
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 is not only for the family
member
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, we can own the
busine
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ss but we sh
Accept comma addition
business, but
ould not have that
business
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 only for a single family.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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