The prevention of health problems and illness is more important than treatment and medicine

#prevention #health #illness #treatment #medicine

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It is often argued that prevention of illnesses and health issues is of greater importance than therapy and medicine.

Hence

Linking Words

government

Suggestion

the government

should take

this

Linking Words

into consideration in the allocation of funds. Undoubtedly, by deterring the diseases, we are eliminating the problem from its roots. Since there are many

illnesses including

Accept comma addition

illnesses, including

the most common like cardiovascular diseases and diabetes caused by unhealthy food and lack of physical activity, much expenditure on health care can be reduced. If

government

Suggestion

the government

raised more awareness about the detrimental consequences of

such

Linking Words

lifestyle, than there would be a decline of cases of these diseases.

However

Linking Words

, there are myriad diseases, which cannot be prevented. Despite all the precautions many viruses and infections manage to penetrate the human body. Number of diseases are inherited,

thus

Linking Words

the only way to live for these people is

med

Suggestion

MED

meet

compliance. Beyond that, reasons of many illnesses remain challenges of our time and even of those, which seemed already comprehended.

For example

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, a non-smoker, who leads a healthy lifestyle, can still have a

lungs

Suggestion

lung

cancer.

Consequently

Linking Words

, the therapy must be present and require financing as well as drug research. In conclusion, determent and treatment jointly represent an integrated and holistic approach against health problems. With

this

Linking Words

in mind the government should allocate funds on the equal basis to tackle a problem from different directions.

Submitted by alinamierna on Tue Nov 12 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

221 words

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The prevention of health problems and illness is more important than treatment and medicine

Fully explain your ideas

More and more people are opting for ready-made food instead of freshly cooked food. Do this development has more advantages over disadvantages.

In the past when students did a university degree, they tennded to study their own country. Nowdays , they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

It is often argued that it is difficult to get children to read. Why do you think this is? What measures could be taken to encourage children to read more? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Differences between countries are barely evident these days . Everyone in the world is wearing the same brands and watching the same TV channels and movies. Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?