IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 1.5

In the past children were taught how to save money, but today they only learn how to spend it. Do you agree

#children #money
Al
thought b
 experienced a fluctuation in the
first
 five years between 70, its opening
figure
, and 80, its peak, after which
this
figure
 settled down in the
last
 five years and, ending at 56. The ball
also
 had a similar pa
tter i
a perceptual structure
pattern
n the
first
 fivers, growing from 68 to 81,
this
 number plummeted ,
h
Accept space
,
itting The value aw
s f
to the same degree (often followed by 'as')
as
luctuated between 56, its starting point, and 70, its peak,
this
figure
 settled down afterwards, ending 65. Even though D had a similar pattern of increase, climbing from 58 to 64 in the
first
 half decade,
thereafter
,
this
figure
 plummeted, hitting a 21 and finished there,O
v
Accept space
,
erall, what stands out from
this
 graph is that even though science related subject was most popular among the youngest students’ group, those who aged between above 45 years old prefer non science.
Submitted by Sal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: