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Band 5

Question ;some people think that children should attend extra classes outside the school others say that they should be allowed sometime for playing .discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #classes #school
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In the contemporary world, children learning
study
Use synonyms
 in classrooms
instead
Linking Words
 the extra classes outside the
school
Use synonyms
.
whereas
Suggestion
Whereas
,
Accept space
,
children should spend time for outdoor activities.Both have
important part
Suggestion
the important part
an important part
 of their
life
Use synonyms
. According to my perspective, children should attend extra classes and playing games for mentally and physically growth. A number of benefits for juvenile to attending extra classes outside the
school
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
children get more information about
study
Use synonyms
 and work.
youngsters
Suggestion
Youngsters
 show their interest to visiting historical buildings and museums so on.By
this
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
students know to different languages and cultures. Some children achieve more information and after
school
Use synonyms
 they attend to tuition classes because in the
school
Use synonyms
 offspring do not higher education at few hours.They communicate with new people's.
For
Linking Words
instance in
Accept comma addition
instance, in
 the
school
Use synonyms
 student learning only theory and they do not practical work
.
Accept space
.
While students face problems
to
Suggestion
in
 learning
study
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
sports are important in every
person
Suggestion
person's
life
Use synonyms
.Without entertainment
life
Use synonyms
 is dull.
some
Suggestion
Some
 children
overstress
Suggestion
 on mind about
Use synonyms
study
Suggestion
the study
 and they do not time spend for playing games because they
always doing
Suggestion
are always doing
always do
Use synonyms
study
Suggestion
the study
a study
.By
this
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
children do not fit as
fiddle
Suggestion
a fiddle
 in health.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
a few children good in sports and they
always playing
Suggestion
always play
are always playing
 games like as
,
Accept space
,
cricket
,
Accept space
,
football
,
Accept space
,
tennis so on.But they do not better in
Use synonyms
study
Suggestion
the study
studies
 and they choose for sports as well
as career
Suggestion
as a career instead
instead
Linking Words
 of education. In my opinion
,
Accept space
,
both have
important part
Suggestion
an important part
 in their
life
Use synonyms
. People should always respect the both views because without knowledge and experience people
do not succeeds
Suggestion
do not succeed
 in their
life
Use synonyms
.
so
to a very great extent or degree
So
,
Accept space
,
that's why people should manage their precious time.
First
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
children prefer to get extra information and sometimes children feel boring and they
playing
Suggestion
play
are playing
 games for entertainment.
To conclude after
Suggestion
To conclude, after
 analysing all the aspects it is
clear
Suggestion
clearly
 seen that most offspring benefit greatly from
such
Linking Words
 joining tuition classes after that
school
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
school
Use synonyms
 authorities should encourage to children should be allowed for playing more creative and interesting
Submitted by hktoor.1997 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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