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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governmnents must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#government #investment #arts #music #theatre #waste #money #governmnents #services
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Although
Linking Words
 all public services are equally sponsored by governments, people claim that investment in the cultural trends as music and theatre is the waste of money. I completely disagree with the current idea and the reasons will be explained in the following paragraphs as I believe that
art
Use synonyms
 creates ethnicity of the particular nation. On the one hand,
art
Use synonyms
 enriches culture of the society and by investing in the current industry, government encourages people to explore and develop their unique talents.
In addition
Linking Words
, those who are interested in
art
Use synonyms
 phenomenon are
diversitically
Suggestion
 educated and have more chances to find their coveted spot in life.
For instance
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, recent research of Alabama University shows that in 45 % of
cases students
Accept comma addition
cases, students
 who chose arts, got extra
creativre
having the ability or power to create
creative
 skills which made them more attractive
on
Suggestion
to
 the American
labor
a social class comprising those who do manual labor or work for wages
labour
 market.
On the other hand
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,
art
Use synonyms
 fetuses create
cultural value
Suggestion
the cultural value
 of the nation.
Morover
in addition
Moreover
, it may attract interest and attention people from different countries which glorifies the country globally and financially benefits it. A good example could be Bolshoy
Theatre which
Accept comma addition
Theatre, which
increase
Suggestion
increases
stadarts
a learner who is enrolled in an educational institution
students
 in the ballet dance and made Russia popular all over the world.
Finally
Linking Words
, each self-respecting traveller who is going to visit the above mentioned country, put visiting ballet show in must-see list. In conclusion,
governmnets
the organization that is the governing authority of a political unit
government
 ought to spend
pretty big amount
Suggestion
a pretty big amount
 of money to improve
arts industry
Suggestion
the arts industry
 as it has a big impact on society culture and country’s worldwide success.
Hence
Linking Words
, it maintains cultural diversity and uniqueness.
Submitted by iryna on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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