Some people feel that entertainers (e.g. film stars, pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of jobs should be highly paid?

Being a celebrity has many benefits
,
Accept space
,
however
, some people argue that they are overly paid for their services, while the people who are actually contributing towards the betterment of the population
such
as defence people and teachers are paid less. I agree with assertion and would provide evidence to support my statement.
To begin
with, nowadays celebrity payouts have been enormous for something they have acted for and it is not even real.
Firstly
, these entertainers has multiple sources of income, one they generate from royalty and other they get from endorsing products in advertisement.
For example
,
last
month a movie of the actor did a business of 300
crore
, and the actor was paid a certain percentage of the profit and his fees.
Secondly
, In a
country
, like India we have 40% of the population is below the poverty line and in the same
country
we are having people who are earning more than the GDP is upsetting. Alternatively, there are some professions which are dutiful towards the
country
however
are paid in peanuts,
such
as military people and the educators. Soldiers who are giving their lives for protecting others should be given more salary than, life is more important than any film or cricket match.
Furthermore
, teachers are changing link for children, they adapt and learn from
this
, most of our youth are influenced by their professors and
thus
, I think that they should be highly paid as they are nurturing our youth to become a better human. In conclusion, celebrities are unnecessary given excessive attention and money, if
this
would be spent on their professions mentioned in the above essay our
country
would become a better place to live.
Submitted by write2navleen on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: