Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It cannot be denied that growth in areas like medicine,
education
, and trade is crucial for the upliftment of economically backward societies. Some believe that this
assistance must be provided by the
affluent Correct article usage
apply
nations
on a larger scale. I strongly agree with this
notion because it will help the poorer countries to come out of the poverty trap and in turn reward the developed countries with added revenue as well as
cheap labor
.
To start with, poor Change the spelling
labour
nations
lack resources to help their areas that are ridden with poverty and diseases. Developed nations
can pull them out of this
trap by funding hospitals, schools etc. If a portion of these basic survival amenities are provisioned, the citizens can then
move on to finding a job and working hard at it. Moreover
, it is a noble act to help others in need and would set up examples of humanity. For example
, many global programmes fund meals and education
for the children in Africa, who cannot afford to do so themselves. This
has brought down the rate of mortality and helped promote education
in the
underprivileged areas.
Correct article usage
apply
Secondly
, it is a win-win situation for the rich nations
as trading in these countries would give a boost to their economy as well. Consider a situation where a popular brand from the west
sets up a branch in Africa. Capitalize word
West
This
would mean increased sales and exposure to international businesses, both for the western country and Africa. For example
, leading IT companies like Google and Microsoft, are now opening up their branches in cities like Somalia, because of the increased business potential for them and the cheap cost of labor
.
Change the spelling
labour
To conclude
, it is important for developed nations
to take this
responsibility of
helping the poorer Change preposition
for
nations
in sectors like health, education
, and trade in order to pull them out of the poverty trap. This
would be economically beneficial for the powerful nations
as well.Submitted by man3meet4 on
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coherence cohesion
There is a strong introduction and conclusion, providing a clear position on the topic. To improve further, consider refining transition phrases to enhance cohesiveness between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, using linking words and phrases to guide the reader logically through your essay. This will help further in maintaining coherence across paragraphs.
task achievement
While the examples provided are relevant and supportive, consider expanding on them slightly with more specific details to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
The essay provides a strong, clear, and comprehensive response to the task, effectively addressing the key points related to health, education, and trade improvements.
coherence cohesion
The ideas presented in the essay are coherent, well-structured, and supported by relevant examples throughout, contributing to a logical argument.
task achievement
Effective concluding remarks that summarize the main points and restate the writer's position confidently.
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