IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that students in school learn better when they studying in group whereas others believe students learn better when they study their own. Discuss both views and give opinion.

Traditionally,
school
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 is the only place where
students
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 can get their fundamental
education
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.
Education
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 plays a vital role in our daily life; without
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education
Add a comma
education,
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 you can find yourself in
illiterate
Correct article usage
an illiterate
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 world. When the child
hit
Wrong verb form
hits
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 4 years of age
;
Punctuation problem
,
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 the parents get him enrolled in
school
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.
School
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 is the only place where everyone starts their primary
education
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. Now days most of the children prefer to
study
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 in groups
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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also
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 many people feel that some pupils want to
study
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 by self.
This
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 essay will discuss both aspects and
draw
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present
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 my personal opinion.
To begin
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 with,
This
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 is understood that
students
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spent
Wrong verb form
spend
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 their time in
school
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 with
friends
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; it could be in
classroom
Correct article usage
the classroom
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,
playground
Correct article usage
the playground
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 and
cafeteria
Correct article usage
the cafeteria
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. As the
play
Check wording
students play
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 games in
school
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team
Fix the agreement mistake
teams
show examples
Punctuation problem
, so
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so
Change preposition
in
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 the same
way
Punctuation problem
way,
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 they want to
study
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 with
friends
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 in a
group
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. Everyone has different perspectives and perception; they can share their knowledge and idea about the lecture in the
group
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 so in the way
students
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 can
study
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 for exams and as well for
group
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 projects and
as well as
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 for
group
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 assignments.
For instance
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,
If
Fix capitalization
if
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 the student
get
Verb problem
apply
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fail
Correct subject-verb agreement
fails
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 to attend the lecture or
absent
Verb problem
is absent
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 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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school
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 so later on he or she can do the remaining
study
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 with
school
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friends
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. On the other side of the
arguments
Fix the agreement mistake
argument
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, some
students
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 prefer to
study
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 by
oneself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
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; they don't want to
study
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 within
the
Correct article usage
a
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group
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. Especially
some
Punctuation problem
, some
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 pupils waste their time during the
study
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in
Change preposition
apply
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chatting and
useless
Verb problem
having useless
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discussion
Fix the agreement mistake
discussions
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 with
friends
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 in
group
Use synonyms
study
Use synonyms
.
In addition
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,
When
Fix capitalization
when
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 they
study
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 alone, they can concentrate more
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then
Use the right word
than
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 the
group
Use synonyms
study
Use synonyms
.
For example
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,
In
Fix capitalization
in
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library
Correct article usage
a library
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Punctuation problem
, majority
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majority of the
Correct word order
the majority of
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 people do their
study
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 in a quiet environment because they want to bring full attention
on
Change preposition
to
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 the topic.
To sum up
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,
It
Fix capitalization
it
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 depends on the
students
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either
Correct word choice
whether
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 they want
Use synonyms
study
Verb problem
to study
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 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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groups or they want in isolation
both
Punctuation problem
; both
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 have
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
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 advantages and disadvantages. Research has proved that those
students
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 are more intelligent who do their
study
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 in groups.

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task response
Make your view clear in the first part and repeat it in the end.
structure
Use one main idea in each paragraph and link it to the task.
content
Give examples that fit the idea and explain how they show your point.
content
The essay talks about both sides of the topic.
coherence
Some linking words are used to join ideas.
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