IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Computer games has its problems. What are these problems and possible solutions.

#computer #games
The
computer
game
 is an invention that has gained traction in recent times because of easy access to
computer
Suggestion
a computer
computers
the computer
. Overexposure to
computer
 games has detrimental effects on people and children that must not be overlooked. In
this
 article, I will be discussing the problems associated with playing
computer
 games and ways tackle them.
First
,
computer
 games inhibit
development
 in children. These growth areas include social and mental
development
.
For instance
, it has been reported in
literatures
Suggestion
the literatures
 that children of every age get stunted by overexposure and attachment to
computer
game
 when compared with their counterparts with lower exposure.
This
 results from loss in valuable
time
 that would have been spent interacting with parents, adults and peers because human interaction is required in building necessary life skills.
Moreover
,
computer
game
 addiction results in
time
 and energy wastage. Individuals that are into
computer
 games are blinded by their affinity and bias
for
Suggestion
to
 it that they fail to see the amount of productive
time
 they squandered on it. To forestall the inimical effects on the
development
 of children, guardians should ensure they limit the amount of
time
 a child is allowed access to
computer
Suggestion
a computer
computers
the computer
.
Thus
, children will have ample
time
 to interact with people and carry out activities that are capable of enhancing their overall
development
.
Besides
, education will help curb the problem of
time
 and energy wastage. Individuals that are affected by
computer
game
 addiction rarely see how it actually affects them.
Therefore
, showing them how
this
 negatively affects them will guide them in making
wise decision
Suggestion
wise decisions
a wise decision
 on cutting down on
time
 spent on playing
computer
 games, which will be greatly beneficial to them. In conclusion,
computer
 games are readily available and played by many these days. Playing
this
game
 has attendant inimical effects. In
this
 essay, I have carefully examined
some
one or some or every or all without specification
any
 pressing problems that are associated with playing
computer
 games and proffered solutions to them as well.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: