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Band 4.5

as a result of electronic inventions such as the computer and television, people do less physical activity, and this is having a negative effect on their health. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#inventions #computer #television #people #activity #effect #health
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Greatest technical inventions that made the world to be connected in today's era are electronic gadgets, which are becoming the
reason
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 for keeping the people away from outdoor activities and leading to various
health
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 problems. I would like to differ with
this
Linking Words
 statement. Planning a
day
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 with the right amount of time allocations for electronic gadgets, physical activities would benefit the individuals to save themselves from illnesses. On the brighter side of the coin, every invention has a cause and should be used for the same
reason
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 to avoid misuse of it. A
day
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-to-
day
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 schedule with the right amount of time allocations for electronic gadgets and physical activities will keep an individual away from
health
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 issues. In a 24-hour
day
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 schedule, 7 hours of minimum sleep, 2 hours of physical outdoor activity, 9 hours of office work, 2 hours of electronic
gadgets
Suggestion
gadget
 usage and rest 4 hours
for
Suggestion
in
 the social life with a proper diet leads to a happy and healthy life.
For example
Linking Words
, statistics generated in the UK reveal that proper planning of a
day
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 results in
health
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 and happiness. On the other side, addiction to electronic devices is leading to major
health
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 issues. Continuous watching of television and computer games more than 4 hours
leads
Suggestion
lead
 primarily to laziness, which in turn leads to obesity. Secondarily, increases the dizziness, which leads to a
tumor
an abnormal new mass of tissue that serves no purpose
tumour
 in some cases, because of the electromagnetic radiation delivered from devices.
For example
Linking Words
, 80 percent of
obesity
Suggestion
obese
 patients
reason
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 is over usage of the TV and Computer games. To summarize, In my opinion, a thoughtful invention should not be a
reason
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 for
health
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 issues. A well planned
day
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 and an appropriate usage of electronic goods with the right diet in place will solve all kinds of issues.
Submitted by eshwar10882 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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