he percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last 10 years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#percentage #children #society #years #effects #trend

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Obesity is a medical condition which causes the overweight in

children particularly

Accept comma addition

children, particularly

in western society with an increase in ten fold by 20%. Over Weight can be reduced in youngsters by doing proper exercises, fat loss diet and good sleep. Let us discuss more about

this

Linking Words

in detail in the following paragraphs. The main factor contributes to the stout personality is inefficient

life style

a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes

lifestyle

and no or

little

Suggestion

less

excersise

the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit

exercise

exercises

exercised

. Kids often have a penchant for junk

food

Use synonyms

and

this

Linking Words

leads to a plump personality. Take an instance of the survey conducted by the University of British Columbia, kids with a Body Mass Index

(

Accept space

(

BMI) prone to heart diseases.. If

this

Linking Words

trend

continues

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continues, then

then

Linking Words

definitely

little

Suggestion

less

fewer

people will suffer from serious ailments. Obesity is the main cause of

Diabtes

a polygenic disease characterized by abnormally high glucose levels in the blood; any of several metabolic disorders marked by excessive urination and persistent thirst

diabetes

and hypertension,

Moreover

Linking Words

, it has a drastic effect on the child's mental and physical health.

However

Linking Words

, there are some standard treatment options available to control Obesity. Fatness can be reduced by taking proper diet regime, doing exercises regularly, and playing outdoor games

Accept space

For instance

Linking Words

a study by the Unites States Department of Health found that obesity will be controlled by eating

food

Use synonyms

in tiny plates rather than in big ones.

This

Linking Words

is because consuming

food

Use synonyms

in small plate makes kids eat less.

Linking Words

Also younger

Accept comma addition

Also, younger

people

needs

Suggestion

need

support from their parents. The conclusion is kids must be refrained from junk foods and

incorpating

make into a whole or make part of a whole

incorporating

health eating habits makes

nation

Suggestion

a nation

a safer one.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, government should take measures to impose restrictions on the

food

Use synonyms

industry by imposing hefty fines which have a direct impact on the weight loss.

Submitted by sakhamurimahesh on Fri Nov 29 2019

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

263 words

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he percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last 10 years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Your opinion

Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that zoos have no useful purpose. Others believe that zoos are beneficial in many ways. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Both government investment in public transport systems and reductions in public transport ticket prices will help to reduce transport pollution greatly. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that ambition is essential fo success. To what extend do you agree?

In many countries it is common for parents to give their children pocket money. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this practice?