Wealth does not necessarily guaranty happiness. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Provide reasons for your answer. Include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Many people around the world tend to work extremely hard in the pursuit of happiness, and most of the times they consider, "being wealthy" is the only path to
achive
to gain with effort
achieve
their
altimate
furthest or highest in degree or order; utmost or extreme
ultimate
destination solitude. Opponents absolutely think
otherwise
. I completely agree with the fact that, in order to be joyful there are other
alternatives including
Accept comma addition
alternatives, including
family and the job that we like. Billionaires who have astronomical wealth are
aften
many times at short intervals
often
been victims of pressure and
stess
the relative prominence of a syllable or musical note (especially with regard to stress or pitch)
stress
which comes from managing and
maitaining
keep in a certain state, position, or activity; e.g., "keep clean"
maintaining
all their wealth.
For example
, Steve Jobs, who was the CEO of the company Apple, and was once the richest person on the
plannet
(astronomy) any of the nine large celestial bodies in the solar system that revolve around the sun and shine by reflected light; Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto in order of their proximity to the sun; viewed from the constellation Hercules, all the planets rotate around the sun in a counterclockwise direction
planet
plane
, felt that his net
worh
worthy of being treated in a particular way
worth
never made him happy, rather,
family
Suggestion
the family
could have been the real proposition that could have kept him in peace. During his
last
moments of life, he was regretful of being able to achieve the
pinacle
(architecture) a slender upright spire at the top of a buttress of tower
pinnacle
of the success and become
richest person
Suggestion
the richest person
in the world at the cost of his happiness. Most of the workforce these days are running around and putting more hours on a daily basis at their workplaces to simply make the most money out of their jobs. They are sacrificing the most valuable things like their social moments, exercise, and sometimes much needed sleep as well. All of these sacrifices in order to become rich are taking toll on the people's lives. As an example, employees who are working in IT sector nowadays, psychologically worked up immensely.
As a result
, they are becoming victims of heart problems, depression and diabetes.
This
eventually let
Suggestion
eventually lets
them never be happy in their lives. In conclusion, being able to become financially strong not always necessarily the solution for being cheerful in life.
Submitted by adds.dharmapuri on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: