some people believe that if people are allowed to work after the age 60, it would cause problems for younger people

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Few individuals ascertain that who are aged 60 should continue their jobs,

this

Linking Words

effect troubles for fresh graduates.I completely agree that older people must retire at the age of 60, so that graduates can get plenty of job opportunities in various sectors and can reduce crime in the country. These days students are undergoing through various internships and practical training sections which acquires knowledge and industry skills at

very young age

Suggestion

a very young age

.Industries should take an initiative that

empolyees

a worker who is hired to perform a job

employees

employers

must stop working at the age of 60.

This

Linking Words

leads to vacancies in the industries in various

sectors so

Accept comma addition

sectors, so

that younger talented students can apply for these available posts and crack the interview.

For example

Linking Words

, SCCL it is a Government

industry which

Accept comma addition

industry, which

produces coal from both underground and open cast mines in India, they are many workers who are over 60 years and still working in the severe conditions which reduces the production. After allowing younger one's into the task, they outperformed the work and production has increased.

Although

Linking Words

older people have the

experience but

Accept comma addition

experience, but

they cannot work like younger one in difficult kind of task. People over 60 years continue to do jobs in the industries, which leads graduates into

unemployement

the state of being unemployed or not having a job

unemployment

this

Linking Words

results in the robberies and crime rate. Individuals who

graduates

Suggestion

graduate

have graduated

from the university with

execellent

very good;of the highest quality

excellent

percentage if the person does not see any vacancies in the companies, how one can live their lives without any jobs and opportunities.

This

Linking Words

consequences

Suggestion

looking for easy money and lead happy life by doing criminal activities during late night. In conclusion, older people must restrict up to 60 years and give

Suggestion

chance to students.

This

Linking Words

makes company to

increasing

Suggestion

increase

their production and using new technology which is advised by the graduates who undergone to several industrial training and gain knowledge and implemented advanced working techniques.

rrshankarreddy

Nov 30, 2019

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

303 words

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some people believe that if people are allowed to work after the age 60, it would cause problems for younger people

Some people think that current environmental issues are global problems and should therefore be dealt with by the government, while others believe that these problems can only be tackled by individuals. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Higher education could be funded in three ways. all costs paid by government, all costs paid by students or student paying all costs through a government loan. what are the advantages of these choices?

Many young children have unsupervised access to the internet and are using the internet to socialise with others. This can lead to a number of dangerous situations which can be threatening for children. What problems do children face when going online without parental supervision.

Write a letter to your manager to request setting up a cafeteria for the staff.