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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Young people today are better qualified than they were in the past. Some people argue that this is because competition for jobs is greater than it used to be. Others say that people only continue their educatiok because the opportunities exist for them to do so. Discuss both the views and give your own opinion.

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Millenials
Suggestion
Millennials
, now prefer to be well-educated in comparison to the past. Some people
justifies
Suggestion
justify
this
Linking Words
 by stating that it's the job competition for which they have to study
hard
Accept comma addition
hard, however
however
Linking Words
, others believe that it is because of the numerous opportunities that they have now. I,
nevertheless
Linking Words
 believes that it is both, the eligibility criteria for jobs and the globally integrated courses which encourages youth to have qualitative
education
Use synonyms
. It is the eligibility criteria which asks for higher
Use synonyms
education even
Accept comma addition
education, even
 for a lower vacancy. The companies or organisations these days
demand
Suggestion
demands
 for lateral thinking skills which can only be attained after clearing minimum basic
education
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the bar has been set up real high for the vacancies and people with lower grades and
education
Use synonyms
 fails to achieve it.
Hence
Linking Words
, people who are after getting jobs
only consider
Suggestion
to only consider
 the quantitative aspect of
education
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
in contrast
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, the
education
Use synonyms
 system provides
plethora
Suggestion
a plethora
 of integrated courses which universalizes the
education
Use synonyms
 and people with
progressive spirit
Suggestion
a progressive spirit
the progressive spirit
 tend to grab the opportunities as
many
Suggestion
much
 as they can.
Hence
Linking Words
, considering the qualitative aspect of
education
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, Malala Yousaf, the youngest motivational speaker who talks about
reformation
Suggestion
the reformation
a reformation
 of the society only through
education
Use synonyms
. Alongside, the availability of the study material now, is quite enormous, updated and authentic.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the youth aims at getting
higher and qualitative
Suggestion
a higher and qualitative education
education
Use synonyms
 and
hence
Linking Words
, look for integrated courses. In my opinion, the blend of qualitative approach and quantitative approach of
education
Use synonyms
 only, can help our millennials to be young achievers like, Sabeer Bhatia (Indian-American Businessman) founder of hotmail and can provide the exposure which is mandatory to enhance the lateral skills and to draw out the maximum output from the human resource. To conclude, the youth would meet the job demands
if, they get
Suggestion
, if they get
 the exposure to the integrated educational system.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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