the government’s investment in arts, music and drama is a waste of money. Government should invest these funds in public health services instead. To what extend do you agree with this statement.

#government’s #investment #arts #music #drama #waste #money #government #funds #health #services

It is commonly believed that the regime should finance public services rather than investing in fields

such

as arts, music, and plays.

Although

I agreed that spending on

healthcare

Suggestion

health care

important but

Accept comma addition

important, but

I do not think spending on the arts is a waste of money.

To begin

with, there are several reasons for allocating a significant amount of government budget on public services.

First

and foremost, public services

such

as hospitals and schools are things which determines what quality of that, most of us will have. To illustrate, if proper funds are not allocated for schools, our children may not get proper education and

similarly

if they do not establish good

healthcare

systems in the country, the health of society may

declines

Suggestion

decline

Besides

this

, poverty-stricken people will be affected severely as they cannot afford the

healthcare

Suggestion

health care

services provided by private hospitals and institutes.

Consequently

, they are more dependent on basic services provided by the state and central government. In spite of

this

, arts and dramas should not be neglected at the cost of basic

healthcare

Suggestion

health care

Firstly

, it is really difficult for many arts

institute

Suggestion

institutes

to generate profits to run

business

Suggestion

a business

successfully, so without some help from the administration, many theatres and other

such

places may have to close forever.

Furthermore

, many people get pleasure in going to see music and

theater

a building where theatrical performances or motion-picture shows can be presented

theatre

performances to unwind their stress and work pressure, so it is really pivotal for the government to assist

such

art

theaters

a building where theatrical performances or motion-picture shows can be presented

theatres

features

theatre

so they can continue providing entertainment to the public. To conclude, there are clear advantages of large amount of investment goes into public services as

this

influence the quality of life for everyone,

however

, I do not think that allocating funds to the arts is a waste of resources like

this

to provide important benefits

such

as entertainment.Q

Submitted by aarav_23_1981 on Sun Dec 08 2019

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

300 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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the government’s investment in arts, music and drama is a waste of money. Government should invest these funds in public health services instead. To what extend do you agree with this statement.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that fittest and strongest individuals and the team can achieve success in sports, while others believe that success depends on mental attitude. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important for children’s development as other subjects, so they should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree?

The title "I had to show courage." Describe a circumstance where you had to exercise courage. What action of yours required a lot of bravery? Afterwards, did you feel proud of yourself? How did your surroundings respond?

Do you think that technological advancement has brought more harm than good? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?