IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The claim that animals have rights has been subjected as a matter of debate since the 1970's . Are Zoos helping or hurting our animals? Should zoos be banned ?

Animal rights
is
Suggestion
are
 a subject of debate
from
Suggestion
for
 decades. Environmentalists are in favour of
this
Linking Words
 fact that, like human rights, there should be laws to protect animals internationally.
This
Linking Words
 should be accepted and applied all over the world uniformly. We will discuss more towards the involvement of zoos to protect animals. Zoos are places designated to keep animals of all kinds in one place. They are mostly found in cities. Grouped by their types all of them are kept inside fences. School going
children loves
Accept comma addition
children, loves
 to visit the zoo. The reason behind
this
Linking Words
 is that they can experience wildlife with their bare eyes.
This
Linking Words
 is not only educational event for
them but
Accept comma addition
them, but
also
Linking Words
 provides shelter to various kinds of Animals. Zoos help in protecting animals, which are near to extinction. The controlled environment provides food, shelter and protection as well. In
this
Linking Words
 environment, they can grow peacefully without any fear of getting hunted down by predators.
Also
Linking Words
, they get immediate medical attention if required, which
further
Linking Words
 enhances the overall age of these creatures. To summarize, the presence of zoos is helpful and practical implementation of protecting them from all the odds they have to undergo in a forest.
This
Linking Words
, in fact, is their right.
Thus
Linking Words
, animal rights are as important as human rights and could be supported easily with the help of institutions like zoos.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: