IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some people think that to learn about other countries, they need to travel. Some say that it is not necessary to travel; we can have information through TV and the internet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #countries #travel #say #information #tv #internet
Some people believe that travelling is the best way to learn about the culture and tradition of a foreign county,
however
, I firmly believe that we can
also
 learn about other countries with the help of Internet and Television. On the one hand, few people feel that vi
sit t
Suggestion
a visit
o a different country allows us to get practical experience about their places, foods and local people, which is simply not possible by visiting a website or reading a book. A book and website can provide us with
information
 about the local fo
ods but i
Accept comma addition
foods, but
t ca
n not g
can not
cannot
ive us a feeling of eating the local foods. Travelling provides us a chance to interact with the local pe
ople which e
Accept comma addition
people, which
nable us to get a deep understanding of that particular region.
Furthermore
, it is often seen that some stories and
information
 shared by a few media houses are not always correct, so travelling provides us an opportunity to validate the reality.
For ex
ample in a
Accept comma addition
example, in
 recent scenario where many foreign news channels spread incorrect
information
 about Kasmir and claimed that it is unsafe to visit th
ere but w
Accept comma addition
there, but
hen few foreign tourists visited there they had an entirely different experience and they found the place very peaceful.
On the other hand
, there are some people strongly feel that one can learn about other countries culture and traditions with the help of technology
such
 as the Internet and Television and I
t
objective form of "I"
me
otally support
this
 view. The Internet can give us a chance to get a vast amount of
information
 written by eminent people about the food and habits of people.
In addition
 to
this
, it
also
 gives us a platform to chat with people who live thousands of miles away from us without. vi
siting t
Suggestion
Visiting
here.
For instance
, a recent study has indicated that more than 100 million people talk to people who are from a totally different region and cultural backgrounds. In conclusion, many people prefer to visit a county to know about their customs and traditions,
however
,i
Accept space
,
b
refers to the speaker or writer
I
elieve that one can get an ample amount of knowledge by using technology.
Submitted by supriya.chdhr on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural immersion
  • Interactions
  • Tourism
  • Local economies
  • Cross-cultural understanding
  • Carbon emissions
  • Accessibility
  • Diverse perspectives
  • Authenticity
  • Reliability
  • Virtual reality
  • Immersive experiences
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