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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

1. In recent years, pressure on school and university students has been increasing and they are pushed to work very hard from a young age. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#years #pressure #school #university #students #work #age #development
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Nowadays, many people are concerned that
study
 pressures on students of all ages have been growing steadily. At the same time,
however
, there is some uncertainty about the merits or demerits of the situation. In
this
 essay I will examine both sides of the debate to seek a conclusion.
To begin
 with, so-called “Tiger parents” argue that increased
study
 pressures are not optional but necessary in an over-populated and intensely competitive society. To ensure
success
 in life, an early start in English and music classes, followed by admission to prestigious local schools should be followed by an Ivy League degree and alumni network. Meanwhile, in order to ensure winning scores, discipline, and work ethics, the workload from school is increased by extra-mural academic programs.
On the other hand
, more young people are succumbing
topsychological
Suggestion
to psychological
 illnesses,
such
 as depression and even suicide,
as a result
 of the unmanageable pressures.
Furthermore
, the growing
study
 burden leaves youngsters no time for sports or recreation, leading to a reduction in physical health.
Moreover
,
instead
 of guaranteeing
success
, the pressures created can sometimes be
counter-productive
tending to hinder the achievement of a goal
counterproductive
, damaging family relationships or killing students’ interest in
study
Suggestion
the study
. To summarize, there is no doubt that
study
 pressures on the younger generation
are for
Accept comma addition
are, for
 the sake of their
success
 in a competitive world. At the same time,
however
, it must be remembered that the goal is
success
 and happiness, not depression and suicide. In the final analysis,
therefore
, we can only conclude that, for the best outcome, parents and schools should always take a student’s well-being and personal aspirations into account.
Submitted by christylau1112 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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