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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people say that a person’s success is as a direct result of the way they were brought up by their parents. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #person’s #success #parents
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The definition of the
success
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 varies from
person
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 to
person
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.
Although
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 some people claim that an individual’s
success
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 is directly proportionate
with
Suggestion
to
 their parent’s upbringing, I,
however
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, disagree with
this
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 view for two reasons. The
first
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 reason why the achievement of
success
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 is not
direct
Suggestion
directly
 connected with the upbringing of guardian is due to trying multiple time till it is achieved. While it is argued that everyone in their life strives for having a
success
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, I believe that most of them quit in the middle and often do not give the
next
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try
Suggestion
trial
 or
Linking Words
second chance
Suggestion
second chances
a second chance
 to tasting it. Consider Elon Musk as an example, who has experienced the
success
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for
Suggestion
in
 sending the rocket in the Mars at his tenth attempt despite having the failure several times.
Thus
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, a
person
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 should not quit before achieving their goal. The talent with hard
work
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 in the life is another reason. Whereas I concede that many of them do the hard
work
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 to become successful one day in the future, I would argue that hard
work
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 will not pay off until an individual has the talent in that particular field.
For example
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, if any industrialist compelled their child to become a businessman despite having the talent of singing, their continuous efforts in the business would not give
fruitful result
Suggestion
fruitful results
a fruitful result
.
Therefore
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, any
person
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 could get the
success
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 with their hard
work
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 if they worked in the field where their interest is. In short, not only does an individual get
success
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 in their life because of multiple try, but
also
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 choosing
right field
Suggestion
the right field
 with an attitude of hard
work
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.
Therefore
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, I strongly disagree with the view of those who connect the
success
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 with the nurture of the family.
Submitted by jdsmss on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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