In many societies , elderly people often live in retirement homes. This is not appropriate because families should always care for their aging members. Do you agree?

#societies #people #retirement #homes #families #care #members

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays, it is not uncommon to find geriatrics living in old age homes. Some people doesn't mind doing the same,

however

Linking Words

Accept space

others including myself d

oes not support

Suggestion

do not support

this

Linking Words

notion.

Firstly

Linking Words

, It is one's moral duty to take care of his parents and grandparents who have left no stone unturned in making their wards'

life

Use synonyms

better.

In other words

Linking Words

Accept space

hey have worked so hard and have endured sufferings all their

life

Use synonyms

just to give their offsprings happy and stable

life

Use synonyms

Accept space

o now when they need us at

this

Linking Words

tender age to give love and support, we should not back off.

Moreover

Linking Words

Accept space

f we look at the downsides of keeping pensioners in o

ld folk's

Suggestion

an old folk's home

the old folk's home

home

Use synonyms

, Not only they will have resentment as their children left them in

this

Linking Words

home

Use synonyms

but

also

Linking Words

they will feel isolated

Accept space

This

Linking Words

may lead to depression and ultimately

Accept space

deteriorate their overall health. In some communities

Accept space

eople sending their older members of family at rest homes are often looked down upon by society,

this

Linking Words

also

Linking Words

means that it’s not a

cceptable thing

Suggestion

an acceptable thing

to do.

Secondly

Linking Words

, having e

lderly person

Suggestion

elderly people

an elderly person

Suggestion

home

Use synonyms

has proven to be b

oon,

Suggestion

a boon

as they can share their hard earned experience with posterity and inculcate values in them as well

Accept space

Furthermore

Linking Words

, juveniles of the

home

Use synonyms

always feel showered with love and affection by their grandparents and vice a versa.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

Accept space

lderly

advanced in years; ('aged' is pronounced as two syllables)

elderly

people can take care of

home

Use synonyms

while other members of the family a

re out as locked houses always attract

Suggestion

always out as locked houses attract

are out as locked houses always attracting

are out as locked houses always attracted

have out as locked houses always attracted

are out as locked houses always attract

thieves. To conclude, there are plausible factors supporting the view that geriatrics should not be kept in old age homes to have a happy and healthy

life

Use synonyms

, It’s a win -win situation for all the members of the family

then

Linking Words

Tue Dec 24 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
In recent years, there has been a noticeable increase in the number of individuals discussing the importance of retaining trained professionals within their home countries. Some argue that requiring experts, such as doctors and engineers, to work where they trained is necessary, citing reasons such as national investment in education and the need for local expertise. Others assert that personal freedom and global mobility are more essential. From my perspective, while retaining skilled workers offers considerable advantages, it also presents challenges that must be carefully considered.
8
band
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
These days, every business is trying to promote their products by telling people that they are producing new items. But the question is whether this kind of development is helpful or not. Some people believe that trying to build newer things is a positive act. I am completely in favor of this idea and in this essay, I will support my opinion with examples.
6.5
band
It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?
Training children plays a vital role in society. It is believed that children should learn to differentiate between right and wrong from an early age. They should be disciplined if they do something wrong; as this method effectively teaches them to distinguish between good and evil deeds. In my opinion, this statement is true.
5
band
Most artists earn low salaries and should therefore receive funding from government in order for them to continue with their work. To what extent do you agree?
The occupation of an artist is to practise or perform any of the creative arts, using the conscious use of skill and creative imagination. Despite being expressive through their talents, artists are not well-paid. Should there be any financial assistance from the governments? I am of the opinion that regulators ought to act as enablers rather than directly funding craftsmen to pursue their careers.
5
band
Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Children’s using smartphones habit is now one of the most controversial issues that people like to debate. I believe that drawbacks of using electronic device outweigh its benefits.

In many societies , elderly people often live in retirement homes. This is not appropriate because families should always care for their aging members. Do you agree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Most artists earn low salaries and should therefore receive funding from government in order for them to continue with their work. To what extent do you agree?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?