NOWADAYS A LARGE AMOUNT OF ADVERTISING AIMED AT CHILDREN SHOULD BE BANNED BECAUSE OF THE NEGATIVE EFFECTS. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

#amount #children #effects

It is augured that commercial aimed at young people must be forbidden since the number of

children

Suggestion

children's

product

is increasing dramatically in any part of the word. In

this

essay, I totally agree with

this

statement because they don't have ability to afford

expensive

Suggestion

expensive products

an expensive product

product

also

they are not mature enough to distinguish that wanted or needed it.

First

of all, majority of adolescent they

can not

cannot

afford expensive

product since

Accept comma addition

product, since

they are unable to work for

living

Suggestion

a living

. In other word, follow whatever fashionable or tendency can lead to children became materialism. I am a shining example, when I was in elementary school, there are tons of commercial had showed

Accept space

since I was not born in rich family so I felt awkward when

refers to the speaker or writer

cannot have a beautiful doll or

dress

Suggestion

a dress

. Because that,

refers to the speaker or writer

stole it from my classmate, as

result i

Suggestion

a result, I

result I

a result I

a result i

was be grounded

Suggestion

was grounded

, and that was

wose

(comparative of 'bad') inferior to another in quality or condition or desirability

worse

wise

than

refers to the speaker or writer

did not have it.

Furthermore

, children are too young to distinct what need to buy or want to buy, I supposed adolescent request their parents buy a

product

which is cost on the earth

Accept space

since they just want show off to friends. On

other hands

Suggestion

the other hand

other hand

, if government can forbid to release fancy and exaggerate commercial, young people would not know what is the tendency nowadays.

Consquently

Suggestion

Consequently

, children more likely pay attention on study rather advertising material. For

instant

Suggestion

an instant

, my nieces who

doesn't allow

Suggestion

don't allow

watch television and advertising

Accept space

therefore

, she never barging with her parents buy anything for her, and she still happy and satisfied anything

she

of a female

her

own. In conclusion, in my perspective, I am in

favor

promote over another

favour

of the ideal that

Suggestion

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

309 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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NOWADAYS A LARGE AMOUNT OF ADVERTISING AIMED AT CHILDREN SHOULD BE BANNED BECAUSE OF THE NEGATIVE EFFECTS. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

some people think that in the mordern world we are more dependent on each other. Others argue that people have become more independent.

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples decding not to have children.Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.

Many think that religion should be taught in schools while others think it should be avoided. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

More and more people in developing countries are purchasing cars for the first time. What problems does this cause? What do you think is a possible solution?

In recent years there has been a considerable rise in crime committed by young people in large cities. What has caused this? What solution can you suggest?