You live in a room in the college hostel which has severe problems. You would like to move into another room and need your hostel super's permission for that. Write a letter to the hostel super. In your letter, introduce yourself describe the problems explain what type of room you would prefer

#room #college #hostel #move #permission #type

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Dear Sir or Madam, My name is Anna Kim and I am one of the students

lived

Correct pronoun usage

who lived

show examples

in Hudson College hostel building

number

Use synonyms

five,

Use synonyms

room

Add an article

the room

show examples

number

Use synonyms

is 202. I am writing

this

Linking Words

letter to inform you about a

number

Use synonyms

of issues which makes living conditions are inappropriate in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

room

Use synonyms

number

Use synonyms

202. To start with

bathroom

Correct article usage

the bathroom

show examples

there is a problem with isolation materials

that is

Linking Words

why the air temperature in the bathroom is pretty low which,

consequently

Linking Words

, makes it impossible to stay longer than ten minutes.

Moreover

Linking Words

Change the pronoun

show examples

and my roommate often get cold because of washing in a cold

room

Use synonyms

Secondly

Linking Words

, as the

room

Use synonyms

is situated

Linking Words

to the staff office at night we often hear people talking to each other and I must admit that

although

Linking Words

it happens not

everyday

Replace the word

every day

show examples

sometimes it disturbs me a lot.

Finally

Linking Words

, we had our window broken

last

Linking Words

September and since

then

Linking Words

nobody replaced the glass, despite the fact that I had applied for it several times. As it is getting colder we will not be able to live in

the

Correct article usage

show examples

room

Use synonyms

with

broken

Correct article usage

a broken

show examples

window

Fix the agreement mistake

windows

show examples

. I would be very appreciative if you could offer us another

room

Use synonyms

to live

Change preposition

in.

show examples

I understand that there is a lack of free rooms at

this

Linking Words

time of the year

that is

Linking Words

why I do not have special requirements

Change preposition

for

show examples

a new

room

Use synonyms

besides

Linking Words

those mentioned above. I am looking for a positive reply. Yours faithfully, Anna Kim

Submitted by m77470941089 on Sun Jan 05 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

240 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children.) To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent years, it has become quite common for workers to work overtime so that they can get higher salaries or promotions. However, some people hold the view that the working week should be shorter; I tend to agree with this view.
7
band
Some people believe that because of modern technology, it is no longer necessary for people to learn handwriting skills, but others think that handwriting is still an important skill. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Writing and speaking are the crucial aspects of learning.However, there are predominantly two contrasting views where a section of society claims that handwriting skills have become redundant and useless with recent technological advances while other still acknowledges its importance. I believe that this skill is still relevant and worthwhile to learn.
7
band
Computers and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience ? Is this a positive or negative development ?
In today’s digital era, AI and computers are getting more and more involved in online education. This writer contends that artificial intelligence can be used as an absolutely versatile tool to improve online learning, resulting in efficient online studying, as a positive innovation.
4.5
band
Museums and art gallaries should concentrate on works that show histrov and culture of their own countrv rather than works of the other parts in the world. To what extent to do vou aaree or disaaree?
It is thought that exhibitions and museums of each country ought to present only their own nation’s traditions and backgrounds, which I completely agree with. To achieve a clear picture; this matter needs to be seen on a broader canvas.
5.5
band
In many countries,people are now living longer than ever before,some people say an aging population creates problems for governments, other people think there are benefits if sociaty has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?
Recently, there has been an increase in the number of elderly people around the world compared to the past. The people are separated into two groups:some believe that the aging population is a burden in the community, whereas others think there are advantages to the growing elderly population. This essay will argue that the downsides of a large, aging population outweigh the benefits.

You live in a room in the college hostel which has severe problems. You would like to move into another room and need your hostel super's permission for that. Write a letter to the hostel super. In your letter, introduce yourself describe the problems explain what type of room you would prefer

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children.) To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that because of modern technology, it is no longer necessary for people to learn handwriting skills, but others think that handwriting is still an important skill. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Computers and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience ? Is this a positive or negative development ?

Museums and art gallaries should concentrate on works that show histrov and culture of their own countrv rather than works of the other parts in the world. To what extent to do vou aaree or disaaree?

In many countries,people are now living longer than ever before,some people say an aging population creates problems for governments, other people think there are benefits if sociaty has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?