IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people think that only the government can make significant changes in society, while others think that individuals can have a lot of influence. What is your opinion?

#people #government #changes #society #individuals #influence
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The Bar chart illustrates the comparison of how frequent children of age 5 to 12 have
traveled
traveled over or through; sometimes used as a combining term
travelled
 to and from
school
Use synonyms
 using various
mean
Suggestion
means
 of
transportation
Use synonyms
 in two years
that is
Linking Words
 1990 and 2010. Overall
,
Accept space
,
the trend seems to be decreasing in 2012 except for the
car
Use synonyms
 which only increase with respect to 1990. The most widely preferred mode of
transportation
Use synonyms
 in 1990 was walking while,
Use synonyms
car
Suggestion
the car
a car
 was the most used mode of
transportation
Use synonyms
 in 2010. Going and coming to
school
Use synonyms
 by mean of cycling
,
Accept space
,
 bus and walking and bus were almost the same in 1990
that is
Linking Words
 6, 5.8 and 7
million
Use synonyms
 trips respectively.
whereas
Suggestion
Whereas
, in 2010 it decreases to 2, 3 and 5
million
Use synonyms
 trips respectively. Walking was the most preferable mode of
transportation
Use synonyms
 in 1990 about 12.4
million
Use synonyms
 trips were made by walking.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
 Going to
school
Use synonyms
 by means of
Use synonyms
car
Suggestion
the car
 was not that common as only 4.2
million
Use synonyms
 trips were made in 1990. In 2010
,
Accept space
,
 things changed as going to
school
Use synonyms
 by
car
Use synonyms
 was chosen as the
first
Linking Words
 priority and about 11
million
Use synonyms
 trips were made using
Use synonyms
car
Suggestion
the car
a car
.
whereas
Suggestion
Whereas
, walking which was highly preferred in 1990 significantly dropped to 6
millions
Suggestion
million
 trips in 2010.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • society
  • government
  • changes
  • influence
  • policies
  • laws
  • intervention
  • societal issues
  • collective action
  • progress
  • development
  • harmonious
What to do next:
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