many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. why do many working people not get enough exercise? what can be done about this problem?

Almost all people who work do little

exercise

neither during their leisure

time

nor working days, which lead to

health

problems like obesity, heart attack and etc., which will be discussed as follow. Today, people have to work a lot for making their living. Actually, they do not have enough

time

to do

exercise

, and because they get exhausted too much during their working days they prefer to sleep or do something that make them feel relaxed during their free

time

Moreover

, nowadays, eating ready and greasy food of fast foods and restaurants get more and more common, which leads to some

health

problem

such

as obesity, overweight. When a person gets obese, on the one hand, he loos his motivations for doing

exercise

and

on the other hand

, he gets too tired after getting

exercise

, which decrease his desire for exercising more and more, day by day, and

finally

these persons have acute

health

problems in their lives.

For example

, my sister got obese over the

last

6 months about 15 kilograms, because of eating fast foods and siting all

time

at her work. So, I believe that, for preventing of these problems, eating healthy and organic foods shall be advertised by our media to attract people for changing their bad habits and

also

authorities shall make a law for all companies to allocate a specific

time

for their employees'

exercise

. That said, a specific

time

during the working

time

shall be assigned for

exercise

so that all employees

exercise

together in that

time

. In conclusion, I believe that, for preventing

health

problems all people shall be encouraged to do

exercise

either during their working days or in their free times, by defining a specific

exercise

time

in all companies and

also

advertising healthy foods and exercising in our media.

Sun Jan 12 2020

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

301 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Time constraints
Sedentary lifestyle
Passive leisure activities
Workplace wellness programs
Active commuting
Subsidized
Public awareness
Health benefits
Incentivizing
Accessible public spaces

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many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. why do many working people not get enough exercise? what can be done about this problem?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many professional sports, there is an increase in the number of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions?

With the increasing demand for energy sources of oil and gas, people should look for sources of oil and gas in remote and untouched natural places. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages of damaging such areas?

Cashless transaction order of the day most of the time people prefer using plastic cash do you think this is trend will be useful for the society.

If all workers in a company were paid exact same wage regardless of job role there would be much more harmony and cooperation between staff. To what extent do you agree or disagree?