In some areas of US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this?

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Some cities and states of US limiting adolescences to be
outdoor
Suggestion
outdoors
after a certain time at night without
grown-ups
a fully developed person from maturity onward
grownups
.
This
Linking Words
essay disagrees with
Linking Words
this actions
Suggestion
this action
these actions
because
such
Linking Words
limitations
wiolate
fail to agree with; be in violation of; as of rules or patterns
violate
violates
violated
basic human rights and it makes teens spend their free time less healthier
Linking Words
then
conjunction used in comparatives
than
they could. Any kind of curfew is
violation
Suggestion
a violation
of human freedom and it should be imposed only in extraordinary cases like war or
nature
Suggestion
natural
disaster.
This
Linking Words
kind limitations should protect people from getting
in to
expresses motion to a point on, or within, something
into
trouble due to lack of knowledge about
dangers
Suggestion
the dangers
that are waiting for them outside their habitats. Limitations of freedom could lead to confrontation between people and government, what could be transformed in full-scale rebellion.
For example
Linking Words
, curfew imposed on February 2014 in Kiev transformed ordinary demonstration to revolution and
as a result
Linking Words
president and government
was changed
Suggestion
were changed
.
Use synonyms
Health
Suggestion
The health
of adolescences can have
huge negative impact
Suggestion
a huge negative impact
because of spending their free time in the evening with smartphones
instead
Linking Words
of having
face-to-face conversation
Suggestion
a face-to-face conversation
with friends. German
health
Use synonyms
care government
Accept comma addition
care, government
organisation reported in 2016 that computers, smartphones and other relative gadgets can have negative
health
Use synonyms
effects. It was reported that using gadgets
with
Suggestion
to
display more than four hours a day will lead to sight problems.
For instance
Linking Words
,
same
Suggestion
the same health organisation
a same health organisation
health
Use synonyms
organisation stated that almost every
third
Linking Words
youngster in Germany wears glasses due to intensive using of smartphones. In conclusion, imposing of
curfew which
Accept comma addition
curfew, which
prevents teens to be out of doors at evening without adults is serious violation of human rights that could lead to civil unrest and it has
huge negative impact
Suggestion
a huge negative impact
huge negative impacts
on
teens
Suggestion
teens'
teen
health
Use synonyms
.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • enforce
  • juvenile
  • repercussions
  • autonomy
  • adolescence
  • paternalistic
  • delinquency
  • municipality
  • ordinance
  • authoritarian
  • peer pressure
  • social dynamics
  • civil liberties
  • community policing
  • preventative measures
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