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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that women should play an equal role as men in a country's police force or military force, such as army, while others think women are not suitable for these kinds of jobs. Discuss both views and your opinion?

#people #women #role #men #country #police #force #army #kinds #jobs
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Women are considered as an important part of our society. Many think that they should be given equal opportunities in the defence system.
However
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, many believe that women cannot perform well in these departments. In my opinion, women must be offered equal opportunities in every organization. The jobs in military and
police
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 departments are highly demanding. The prerequisites of these roles are physical strength. Owing to limited physical abilities, females are not suitable for an equal role in
this
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 system.
Moreover
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, females tend to be soft hearted and kind. They cannot tolerate the scary scenes of the battlefield. The presence of excessive sympathy in them will deter them to punish the criminals.
Therefore
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, lack of physical strength and sympathized heart are the reasons women should not be offered jobs in the
police
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 or military. The female
gender
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 possesses the qualities of multi tasking and intelligence. Due to these qualities they can perform better as compared to the opposite
gender
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.
In addition
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, in certain societies, it is prohibited for men to touch female offenders. To illustrate, Iran offers many post in
police
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 departments to women because in their culture women criminals must be arrested by similar
gender
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.
Hence
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, the demand of specific
gender
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 and intelligence are the factors which compel everyone to enrol women in the defence organizations. To conclude, it is believed by many that women must be enrolled in military or
police
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 organizations equal to men, while others disagree with
this
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 statement. In my view, women must play equal role in every department.
Submitted by maharsumera on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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