Some people feel that entertainers (eg. film stars, pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid?

#people #entertainers #eg #film #stars #pop #musicians #sports #money #job

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Entertainment has become

Suggestion

important part of everyone’s daily expenses, like

movie ticket

Suggestion

movie tickets

a movie ticket

, football match or even rock concert.

As a result

, as entertainers

Accept space

their income has grown to a record mark without a sign to stop. Some people start questioning the money they earned: do super stars deserve that much income? Personally, I think they do.

Although

compared to other professionals, entertainers are not making

direct contribution

Suggestion

a direct contribution

direct contributions

to the society like fire fighters, doctors or teachers, but they do influence people in other dimensions, which have been shaping the society in a better way. Celebrities like film stars or pop musicians can push the

culture

Suggestion

cultural

interaction between different countries and societies, which is unachievable without them.

For instance

, because of the movie stars from the US, Asian people get the chance to know western culture, like how do people celebrate Christmas, what does Halloween means and so on. We

can not

cannot

deny these positive impacts they have been made,

hence

we need to accept that they are highly paid. Apart from entertainers like film stars or sport stars, I believe people who work in the science field

also

deserve to get high income.

For instance

, it takes decades for a scientist to invent a new medicine for cancer, during the long process, he or

her

female pronoun; a female, or something regarded as female, e.g. a ship

she

needs to give up so much personally life and force on the endless experiments and testings. And the outcome they make could save millions of

life

Suggestion

lives

. Overall, I do not agree that entertainers are over paid. Meanwhile, I believe there are other professionals in

this

society need more attention and need be highly paid for the contribution they have made as well.

Tue Jan 14 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

277 words

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