Some people think that having a set retirement age (e.g. 65 years) for everybody, regardless of occupation, is unfair. They believe that certain workers deserve to retire and receive a pension at an earlier stage. Do you agree or disagree?Which type of workers do you think should benefit from early retirement?

Retirement
Suggestion
Retiring
from professional life is taken up by individuals for various reasons. It could be
to spend
Suggestion
spending
time with loved ones, or could be done for
folowing
about to be mentioned or specified
following
one
's hobby. Irrespective of the reason,
retirement
is important for an
individuals
Suggestion
individual
mental as well as physical health. In my perspective, a fixed
retirement
age
for everybody, regardless of their profession is unjust. The essay
ginerely
usually; as a rule
generally
delineates the setbacks of having a fixed
retirement
age
for all in the following paragraphs. There are various kinds of occupations which require
varied
Suggestion
varying
amount of physical and mental
strength
. The
stress
levels would
also
be different for different kinds of jobs.
For example
a person working in a stock trading firm might experience a higher amount of
stress
as compared to a gardener. The
stress
levels,
however
,
also
depend on the individual. Some people get stressed easily while others might experience a lower level of
stress
and pressure. In my view, setting a fixed
retirement
age
for
everbody
all people
everybody
, without considering the kind of work is not fair. A construction labourer might not have the physical
strength
and stamina to continue working till the very end. In fact, indulging in
strenous
characterized by or performed with much energy or force
strenuous
work after a certain
age
could
also
prove to be fatal.
One
's efficiency and concentration
also decreases
Suggestion
also decrease
with
age
, in turn decreasing the productivity during working hours. Everybody wishes to lead a peaceful and healthy life post
retirement
, it is a time to
persue
carry out or participate in an activity; be involved in
pursue
peruse
your hobby and involve in various kinds of activities which might bring in happiness.
However
, pushing
one
's limit to meet the set
retirement
age
might have detrimental effects. Construction workers, labourers, drivers,
etecetra
would benefit more from an early
retirement
. To exemplify my point
further
, in a city called
Pune situated
Accept comma addition
Pune, situated
in India, a young CEO
,
Accept space
,
passed away at a young
age
of 52 years, because of the
stress
and the pressure to perform constantly. Had he taken an early
retirement
, he would have spent the rest of his life enjoying the little things that bring happiness like playing with his grandchildren
,
Accept space
,
spending time with his wife, involving in social services,
etecetra
. To recapitulate, setting a fixed
retirement
age
for all is unfair to all as various occupations have varied amounts of physical and mental
strength
required. With
age
,
one
's concentration,
strength
and pressure handling capabilities might
also
reduce.
However
,
this
depends on person to person and
one
's occupation would
also
play a major role.

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • set retirement age
  • regardless of occupation
  • unfair
  • deserve to retire
  • pension
  • high-stress professions
  • emergency responders
  • military personnel
  • physical and psychological tolls
  • manual labor jobs
  • physically taxing demands
  • justified
  • healthcare workers
  • burnout
  • psychological strain
  • high-risk environments
  • creative and cognitive jobs
  • productive lifespan
  • financial impact
  • pension system
  • early retirement policies
  • specific professions
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