Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #health #sports #facilities #effect #measures

Some would believe that the most effective way to increase the quality of public

health

is to increase the numbers of sports facilities, while others think that it would not give effective result, so other ideas should be implemented. While extra sporting facilities cover increased

number

of people, I believe that unless the awareness program about the importance of staying healthy is not implemented, individuals would not be interested to work on

this

matter. On the one hand, increased numbers of people would be facilitated with the extra

number

of sporting outlets.

This

is to say that more sporting centres can accommodate more

number

of people, which enables i

ncreased volume

Suggestion

the increased volume

of people to exercise, and it e

ventually improve

Suggestion

eventually improves

the

health

of p

ublic.

Suggestion

the public

For example

, research suggested that 40% of the obesity problem h

as reduced

Suggestion

had reduced

have reduced

in Kathmandu after the government of Nepal implemented the scheme of 1 sports centre per 1000 people.

However

, I think people are still reluctant to join those exercise facilities because they do not understand the consequences of not having proper

health

On the other hand

, the government should raise awareness about the necessity of the sound

health

This

means the authority should debrief people about the negative aspects of unhealthy lifestyle, and how to avoid being a victim of it.

For instance

, a study conducted by the BBC revealed that after the Indian government’s

health

awareness campaign in 2016, the level of public

health

was inclined by 65% and more in the following years.

Therefore

, I opine that p

ublic

Suggestion

the public

should be aware of the importance of healthy body in order to help them become healthy. In conclusion,

although

the increase in sporting facilities addresses m

ore

Suggestion

number

of individuals, I think people would only start to think about their

health

when they comprehend t

definite article

the

importance of sound

health

, which could be explained to them via a

rareness

Suggestion

a rareness

program.

Submitted by christianoronaldo111 on Thu Jan 16 2020

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

310 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

public health
sports facilities
physical activity
exercise
chronic diseases
heart disease
obesity
inclusivity
participation
safe environment
social interaction
community engagement
comprehensive approach
health education programs
environmental factors
healthcare infrastructure
quality healthcare services
public health initiatives

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Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

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1.You have joined a new job recently. Write to your friend about your new job. In your letter •describe the reason for quitting the previous job •show your excitement for a new job and other details •say about your salary package

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