IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Some people believe that parents of children who attend private schools

#families #children #schools #taxes #support #education #system #people #parents
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that parents of children who attend private
schools
Use synonyms
 should not need to contribute to state
schools
Use synonyms
 through taxes. Personally, I completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 view. For a variety of reasons, it would be wrong to reduce taxes for families who pay for private
education
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it would be difficult to calculate the correct amount of
tax
Use synonyms
 reduction for these families, and staff would be required to manage
this
Linking Words
 complex process.
Secondly
Linking Words
, we all pay a certain amount of
tax
Use synonyms
 for public services that we may not use.
For example
Linking Words
, most
people
Use synonyms
 are fortunate enough not to have to call the police or fire brigade at any time in their lives, but they would not expect a
tax
Use synonyms
 reduction for
this
Linking Words
.
Finally
Linking Words
, if wealthy families were given a
tax
Use synonyms
 discount for sending their children to private
schools
Use synonyms
, we might have a situation where poorer
people
Use synonyms
 pay higher taxes than the rich. In my opinion, we should all be happy to pay our share of the money that supports public
schools
Use synonyms
. It is beneficial for all members of society to have a
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
education
Use synonyms
 system with equal opportunities for all young
people
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 will result in a well-educated workforce
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and in turn a more productive and prosperous nation. Parents of children in private
schools
Use synonyms
 may
also
Linking Words
 see the advantages of
this
Linking Words
 in their own lives.
For example
Linking Words
, a company owner will need
well qualified
Add a hyphen
well-qualified
show examples
 and competent staff, and a
wellfunded
Correct your spelling
well-funded
well funded
education
Use synonyms
 system can provide
such
Linking Words
 employees. In conclusion, I do not believe that any financial concessions should be made for
people
Use synonyms
 who choose private
education
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by hamiiid.asgarian on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: