IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

High jobs demands, stress and sense of commitment are among the main reasons people go to work when they are ill. This way they accomplish important tasks, but may infect other or get some serious health problems themselves. In your opinion should people go to work if they are sick? Support your point of view with relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

#jobs #demands #stress #sense #commitment #people #work #tasks #health #support #point
Nowadays, people in general go to
work
 when they are sick for many reasons. Maybe because they think than can lose their job because high
jobs
Suggestion
job
job's
 demands, or simply a sense of commitment. In spite to accomplish some very important tasks, there are many
reason
Suggestion
reasons
 to don’t go to
work
 when we are sick. In my opinion
that is
 a bad decision.
First
 of all, when someone
go
Suggestion
goes
 to
work
 sick, your
health
 can get worse, because their body needs to take a rest, or maybe take some medication. If doesn’t attend their
health
, your sick can affect your performance.
Also
, there are high possibilities to infect
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
 and
this
 can affect the environment of our
work’s
Suggestion
work
 place.
Second
 of all, when someone
go
Suggestion
goes
 to
work
 sick, it is possible lose strength for other important responsibilities.
For instance
, if we are married and have got children, we need to spend time with our family. It
is very important accomplish
Suggestion
accomplishes very important
is very important accomplish
 a lot of personal tasks or obligations, not only our
jobs
Suggestion
job
 obligations. In my case, my family or my personal life is more important than my job, for that I always prioritize my
health
. To conclude, in my opinion people
should not got
Suggestion
should not get
 to
work
 and stay home if they are sick, because their
health
 is more important that their job. If improve our
health
, we will can do our
work
 successfully and attend other responsibilities without problems.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: