Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

A modern
employee
spends much
time
at a
work
, having very few
time
for a fun. The main advantage of
this
is that a
worker
receives more money for his
work
and the main disadvantage is that
continious
continuing in time or space without interruption
continuous
contentious
prolonged working
time
can
cause person's
Suggestion
cause a person's
mental and physical disorder.
This
essay thinks that the drawbacks of a worsened
employee
's health outweighs the benefits of a short-term efficiency rising because an illness caused payed day offs will neglect
this
effect in the long run. One evident benefit of a prolonged working
time
is a short rising of effectiveness of a person, followed by heightening of employer's profits.
For example
, The Cambridge University recently published research that showed that approximately 40 percentages of a company's
profits
Suggestion
profit
earned by a small amount of a hard-working
employee
with high
perfomance
a dramatic or musical entertainment
performance
at a
work
place.
However
,
longed
Suggestion
longer
working
time
can cause burnout state of a
worker
and
this
fact outweighs all benefits.
On the other hand
, a person's sickness caused by a
tiredness
Suggestion
tire
overbalance all benefits both for an
employee
and for a
worker
. The Who recently released statistics that showed that almost every
third
employee
was diagnosed the burnout state, which has
negative influence
Suggestion
a negative influence
at
Suggestion
on
worker
's
perfomance
a dramatic or musical entertainment
performance
at a
work
place. An extended working
time
caused illness wears off mental and physical energy of an
employee
and
as a result
a
worker
lacks efficiency or even takes a
sickness
Suggestion
sick
day offs. In conclusion, a rising amount of people
spend
Suggestion
spends
much
time
at their
work place
a place where work is done
workplace
, having less hours for a leisure. The main benefit is growth of profits both for a company and for an
employee
, and the main disadvantage, that outweighs all benefits, is that a worsened health of a
worker
caused by prolonged working hours can have
huge negative impact
Suggestion
a huge negative impact
on his productivity at
work
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • mental well-being
  • burnout
  • stress relief
  • productivity
  • economic growth
  • career progression
  • skill enhancement
  • quality time
  • financial security
  • leisure activities
  • physical health
  • personal relationships
  • stress-related illnesses
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