IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car, bus or train between 1970 and 2030.

The graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car, bus or train between 1970 and 2030.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The figure given above demonstrates how UK citizens travel daily using the automobile, bus, and
train
Use synonyms
 during the
period
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1970 and 2030. It is apparent from the information supplied that the car has the most used all the time that given
period
Use synonyms
.
The bus
Correct article usage
Bus
show examples
 usage which is
second
Linking Words
 much-used by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
commuters declined during the
period
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
 1970 and 2030.
The
Correct article usage
Train
show examples
train
Use synonyms
 usage, meanwhile, slightly climb and occupy the
second
Linking Words
much-used
Correct quantifier usage
most much-used
show examples
 vehicle
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
somewhere in the vicinity of the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2012. In 1970, approximately 5 million people have traveled by car and
this
Linking Words
 rate increased negligibly in the following decade. The bus stands in the middle of the list with about 4 million commuters in 1970.
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
 following years until about 2012, declined continuously and plunged to 3,5 million commuters which
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 the same rate
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
train
Use synonyms
 users. The
train
Use synonyms
 started to slightly increase until 2000. After a decade,
this
Linking Words
 rate didn't infer until 2010.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
train
Change the verb form
training
show examples
 usage will occupy the
second
Linking Words
 of the şist by rising steadily during the
period
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
 2010 and 2030.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "second".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words train, period with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "declined" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: