IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart illustrates the percentage of male and female executives in six different types of profession across the UK in 2007

The chart illustrates the percentage of male and female executives in six different types of profession across the UK in 2007
#percentage #executives #six #profession #uk
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The bar chart gives us information regards to
distribution
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the distribution
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 of
administrative
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administration
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 by gender over the UK in 2007.
Overall
, it is evident that the majority of males assigned construction as their first priority
while
 females were more interested in teaching.
Closer
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A closer
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 look at
column
Correct article usage
the column
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 reveals that in
analysation
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the analysation
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 of masculine
executive
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executives
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, construction
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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became
Wrong verb form
become
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top
Correct article usage
the top
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 preference with spectacular
porpotion
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portion
proportion
(90%).
Scentists
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Scientists
 and law stood at
second
 and
third
 rank through the approach three
fifth
Change to a plural noun
fifths
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 and just over
the
Correct article usage
apply
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half of the whole working area.Journalism and advertising were
exact
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exactly
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 half and more than two
fifth
Change to a plural noun
fifths
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 respectively.Surprisingly, therapists and
teaching
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teachers
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 were under one in five. Turning to feminine
executive
Fix the agreement mistake
executives
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,teaching and therapists were
maximun
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maximum
 with significant percentages which were 90 and 80 consecutively. Advertising and journalism were two categories that dedicated 50% of whole working placements. Scientists and construction accounted for less
that
Correct your spelling
than
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a
Remove the article
apply
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half of
entire
Correct article usage
the entire
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 professions.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender distribution
  • executives
  • profession
  • percentage
  • disparity
  • workplace equality
  • balanced ratio
  • implications
  • professional sectors
  • senior positions
  • management roles
  • statistics
  • trends
  • workforce
  • leadership
  • corporate ladder
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